More bands for your buck The Art Museum of Southeast Texas has lined up ten musical acts, including Jesse Dayton and Hadden Sayers, for its annual shindig, the Kaleidoscope Creative Arts Festival. Besides the bands, the fest offers art (new works from more than 80 artists) and a "Kids Kaleidoscope" with hands-on, art-oriented activities for children. And yes, the concessions include beer and wine. 10 a.m.8 p.m. today; noon6 p.m. tomorrow. Art Museum of Southeast Texas, 500 Main, Beaumont, (409) 832-3432. $3; $2, seniors; free, children under 11; $5, weekend pass.
What I Want to Be When THEY Grow Up Former Houston Press cartoonist Michael Fry is now a nationally syndicated cartoonist with a book on the shelves. He'll sign copies of the first collection from his strip "Committed." 23 p.m. Barnes & Noble, 7626 Westheimer (at Voss), 783-6016.
JC Penney sneak preview Many celebrities are image-conscious in less-than-obvious ways -- Penny Marshall and Rosie O'Donnell do Kmart commercials, and now here's country superstar Naomi Judd appearing at the sneak preview celebration for the new JC Penney in First Colony Mall. Judd will give a talk, "The Healing Journey," at noon, and then sign autographs. Style shows and local celebrities, including members of the Houston Aeros and the Houston Hotshots, will appear throughout the day. Judd speaks, noon2 p.m. JC Penney, First Colony Mall, the first mall past Westwood Mall on Highway 59 South. Admission is free; but a $5 ticket from any of the charity booths at the event entitles the bearer to a 25 percent discount on any merchandise after the official grand opening on Wednesday.
Sex symbols at the mall Soap stars Keith Hamilton Cobb (Noah Keefer, All My Children) and Christopher Douglas (Dylan Moody, One Life to Live) will meet and greet their fans, answer questions and possibly even offer teasers about upcoming events on their shows. Q&A, 12; autograph session, 35 p.m. Sharpstown Center, 7500 Bellaire Boulevard, 777-1111. Free.
Songs of Tagore The Asia Society presents the internationally acclaimed Battery Dance Company in a program that blends Eastern and Western dance and music. The work celebrates the accomplishments of Nobel Prize-winning Indian poet Rabindranath Tagore. A musical performance by Badal Roy will follow the dance. 8 p.m. Presented by the Asia Society at the Jewish Community Center, 5601 South Braeswood. For tickets, call 439-0051. $50, includes admission to 7:15 p.m. reception; $15; $10, students.
Have a passive-aggressive Mother's Day You all love your mothers, really, we know, and yet Mother's Day and other mom things are often fraught with tension, seething, and just not as happy as they should be. So to avoid worrying about whether Mother's Day will go well, arrange for built-in tension and allow yourself some admitted hostility. There are two types of mothers: those for whom nothing is ever enough, and those who don't like to be fussed over. For those who demand the very best, offer a home-cooked brunch. Wreck the kitchen, cut yourself chopping things and burn yourself on pots; mater will feel so guilty that she will, this once, appreciate what you did for her. You win, and she gets a nice brunch. For those reluctant to be feted, pull out all the stops. Take ma to the Omni Hotel for a lavish champagne brunch and a stroll through the sculpture garden. The cost per person is only $32.95 -- so cheap for a once-a-year blowout that she can't call your plans too fancy. You win and she gets a nice brunch. (Warning: do not enlist your own children to help with your passive-aggressive plans. Kids today are bright.) For Omni reservations, call 624-4870.
Jimmie Walker Jimmie "Dy-no-MITE" Walker has filled out a bit since his Good Times days -- possibly because of Little Caesars pizza -- and he's abandoned the tag line for more drawn-out, organized comedic monologues. The '90s Walker, a Las Vegas-style comic and pizza pitchman, has two shows at the Laff Stop, and tonight's is a special pizza party. Kevin Maye is the opening act; Little Caesars, naturally, is the pizza. Walker appears at 8 p.m. tonight and tomorrow. 1952 West Gray, 524-2333. $10 cover; free pizza.
French contemporary art since 1960 Bernard Blistene, a professor at the Ecole du Louvre and director of museums in Marseilles, has published articles on American artists such as Andy Warhol and Cy Twombly, because he knows his way around contemporary art. But tonight he's talking about French contemporary art, a subject he and L'Alliance feel is neglected. Doubters and enthusiasts are invited to hear Blistene discourse on styles and schools of the last 30 years. His slide-enhanced lecture will be in English, and a reception follows. 7 p.m. L'Alliance Francaise, 427 Lovett, 526-1122. $8.
Chess exhibition Local chess expert Larry Englebretson takes on 15 opponents -- all at once. While a Fischer clock keeps time, Englebretson will hop from board to board. The arrangement is great for spectators: unlike most high-level chess matches, this exhibition is not a showcase for staid positional chess. Instead, viewers will be treated to the chills and thrills of aggressive chess, full of sacrifices and the occasional Fool's Mate. Watch the action, 6:459:30 p.m. Barnes & Noble Cafe, Vanderbilt Square, 3003 West Holcombe, 349-0050. Free. To sign up as one of Englebretson's opponents, call 779-9132 by May 8; limited to 15.