Ducks greet you when you enter Bistro Cuisine (4925 West Alabama, 871-9722). But don't let that worry you. They're the ceramic kind and never likely to end up in the cassoulet. While Bistro Cuisine is proudly French, it's not going to convince you that you're in Montmartre, hobnobbing with the likes of Catherine Deneuve. But the more than creditable menu may make you suspend disbelief for just a thrice. If anything is going to do it, the onion soup ($3.65) will. It's the sort that puts hair on your chest. (Not recommended for women who like to engage in a spot of mixed bathing occasionally.) And for added heft, it contains a crouton that's as big as your average biscuit. Bon appetit, y'all!