It would be cruel to claim that the guava empanadas ($1.25) at Cafe Miami (6114 Bissonnet, 772-3042) are one of the gooiest, most glorious desserts in town without explaining how to locate them: on the English-language side of the menu, look under "individual" items for "Cuban pies." (Inexplicably, they aren't listed as a dessert.) Unless your palate is fireproof, first puncture the crunchy, golden brown deep-fried piecrust so that the molten, rosy-mauve guava jam filling runs lavalike onto the plate. Now press down with a fork to squeeze out the rich ivory queso crema. Blow on it to cool, muddle remains messily, then eat with gusto. Lick fork, lick plate. Sigh.