We Read Thom Marshall So You Won't Have To

Don't worry if you didn't read Thom Marshall's latest columns in the Chronicle. Here's what you missed:

January 13:
The Metropolitan Transit Agency chief should continue being called general manager.

(Bonus insight: "Some segments of society make use of special titles not found in other segments -- pope, mayor, chef.")

January 15:
Even if you stop shooting smack, you may need a liver transplant.

January 20:
Three people traveling near Huffman in 1980 blamed hair loss, diarrhea, vomiting and burns on UFOs rather than on traveling too close to Huffman.

January 22:
Some police will be trained to handle crazy people without killing them.

January 24:
"Two or three" e-mails criticize Thom as too harsh in his stance that the MTA chief should continue being called general manager. One of them says nobody should give a shit.

January 27:
Police may not need to kill crazy people.

January 29
Police may have to kill knife-wielding crazy people.

-- As told to George Flynn

Got any other gems we may have missed? Call us at (713)280-2471 or e-mail us at george_flynn@houstonpress.com.