"But same thing: A complaint comes in on them, we get 'em. And if it's not resolved, they're gonna have to arbitrate. And if they don't arbitrate, I'll go out personally and get the stickers off their window. They will not be members."
His own band, the Houston Society Jazz Orchestra, is not a BBB member. Conflict of interest.
Deron Neblett
Jazzman Dan, laying down the groove at St. Vincent de Paul.
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"I can't have that anywhere. We don't market. We work on referral. Frustrates the hell out of us. I cannot be using the forum here to solicit business. You know our database of charities that put galas on? I could have a field day. But it's not right. You just don't do it. You just say no."
Dan Parsons also says, "I'm the savior of the world." He does not mean it literally, of course, but in the sense of his role as the eldest of four siblings: one is a family man, one a successful architect, another a free spirit. And then there's Dan, big brother, who "didn't go out to make big money, didn't go after fame."
And like a big brother, or the savior of the world, he has recruited a disciple to carry on the mission.
Her name is Deana Wade. Dan thinks of himself as her big brother. He hired her three years ago out of a marketing background and "molded" her into the chief investigator she is today. She recently completed her first undercover assignment, gigging a deceptive modeling agency on hidden camera. She is in her late twenties and exceedingly camera-friendly.
"The first time I interviewed with Dan," she says, "he says, 'Here, why don't you hear a typical day in the life of Dan Parsons and what I get on my voice mail.' And the FBI was on there. And I was like, 'You're working with the FBI?' " The first thing he told her in that interview, she says, "was that he was training me to be him."
"The fame," Parsons says, "is teaching others to do it and keep this organization flowing."
The secret to scams, Wade says, is that if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is. Which raises the question of Dan Parsons, who, open-book and all, comes off as perhaps just a little too good to be true himself. Sooner or later, Dan Parsons, like everyone else on the planet, must be selling something.
What is it?
"I am," he admits -- again trying to pass off integrity as dirt -- "a shameless manipulator of information for what I think is a good cause. I would be offended if someone called me a PR flack, but am I one? Of course. Why do you think I opened the door to you? Two primary reasons. One, I don't think we're being used enough. I think we've got some stories. And second is what I call an offensive strike: I'd like to be your friend, so that if you do catch me for DWI on Allen Parkway…"
Imagine, at your job, going on record with this statement. Is this transparent honesty? Or foolishness?
And either way, how does he get away with it?
He is the public face of the Better Business Bureau, and at the end of the day, the Better Business Bureau is in the business of selling trust. Dan Parsons is trust's poster boy. Businesses have to trust him. Consumers have to trust him. Law enforcement has to trust him. Reporters have to trust him. It's the thing that he's paid to provide.
Consider this: It is Dan Parsons's job to be the most honest man in Houston.
"That's why when you came at me for an interview, I'm like, 'Dig, dig. I will give you the shovel….' I can tell you right now, that's the way I am, that's the way we are, that's the way my CEO has empowered me to be….'No comment' doesn't exist at the bureau, and the day it does, I'm out the door."
