Getting Off

Houston-based Sex Addicts Anonymous knows the lesson well: For those caught in the Bubble, lust has no limits

Even in retirement, Ted liked to work. He had not had an idle day since flinging newspapers onto front lawns in middle school. His efforts eventually landed him in senior management at a Fortune 500 company. And after 40 years of marriage and sending four kids through college, he and his wife were set for life. But even at 66, he was restless. So he started a part-time consulting business, which kept him sharp and got him out of the house.

But it didn't keep him out of the Bubble.

And that's where he was on that Tuesday four years ago, the day when everything changed.

Carnes's book became a bible for sex addicts.
Jill Hadley Hooper
Carnes's book became a bible for sex addicts.
Patrick Carnes, Ph.D.
Patrick Carnes, Ph.D.

His wife had already left for the day when Ted woke up, leaned over and pulled out the pornography stash hidden in his nightstand. He always preferred prose over pictures -- it let him use his imagination. His fantasies were about women only, no kids.

The high kicked in and he grew hard. But he didn't masturbate. Instead, he went to the kitchen and fixed a sandwich.

He was now trapped in the Bubble. Sex addicts weren't kidding when they gave it that name. You can see the outside world, but you're not a part of it. You're on cruise control. Adrenaline gets you in, climax gets you out.

His heart beating faster, he drove to his favorite spot at Airline and I-45. He had cruised neighborhoods like this for decades, his eyes trained to find the rough-edged women who were good for a trick. Three or four times a month, often fueled by alcohol, he'd pick up a pro or a woman in a bar.

But after driving around for an hour, Ted had found only empty streets. He pointed the car home, where he methodically made another sandwich.

Ted was a leader, gregarious, the kind of guy who threw himself into whatever he did. He drank hard, but he worked harder, so this urge was never a problem -- or at least no one thought it was.

In reality, he was now powerless. The Bubble's a bitch. It makes you feel safe even while it traps you. He couldn't just masturbate now. He needed the payoff of a cruise -- and a quick one.

Soon he was back, turning off Airline onto a side street, spotting her and figuring almost immediately that she had to be a cop. Late twenties, black, with dyed blond hair, she looked too clean -- not like the typical hollow-eyed zombies. Her clothes fit, her shoes weren't scuffed, she had some bulk to her.

He stopped beside her.

"Are you going to arrest me?" he asked.

Her voice, loud and distinct: "Oh, no --you're going to arrest me."

There are cops in the neighborhood, she said, advising Ted to meet her around the corner where it was safer.

Now he knew she was a cop -- the shined shoes, the clear voice, the meeting place. He could turn right and head to her, or swing left and get the hell home. Maybe his wife would be back. Maybe they could go for a walk.

Ted turned right.

The undercover cop spoke into her hidden mike; the cops in the camera car met Ted. He was busted. He'd have to call his wife to bail him out, and this poor woman would learn the truth.

His life as he knew it was over. And his recovery was just beginning.


The redheaded stepchild of obsessions, sex addiction is silent torture for its victims and a punch line for the public. Disregarded by the American Psychiatric Association, ignored or exploited by the media, often misunderstood by even those who suffer from it, sex addiction hasn't achieved the tolerance and sympathy afforded its big brothers, alcoholism and gambling addiction.

The myths are myriad, and even the name is misleading.

"Sex addiction is not about sex," says Houston sex therapist Barbara Levinson, who has treated Ted and many other addicts. (The recovering addicts consented to be interviewed only if the Press did not use their real names or give personal information that would identify them.)

For many, the term might conjure an image of a swaggering lothario bedding every woman he sees. But Levinson and other experts say sex addicts don't necessarily have more sex than the average person. Some aren't even into actual intercourse; not one of them feels good about their sexual behavior. Their core belief is that they are unworthy human beings; the preoccupation with sex is a coping mechanism that, like drugs, pays off with one hell of a high followed by a lonely, pathetic crash.

The affliction affects from 3 to 6 percent of American adults, according to Patrick Carnes, informally known as the father of the study of sexual addiction. Carnes, the Arizona-based author of Out of the Shadows, the sex addict's bible, defines the addiction as "any sexually related compulsive behavior that interferes with normal living and causes severe stress on family, friends, loved ones and one's work environment."

Addicts have many poisons to choose from: voyeurism, Internet pornography, solicitation, phone sex, masturbation, anonymous sex, molestation, rape. Sexual addiction isn't characterized by the act itself but by the hallmark of all addictions: the need to escalate the behavior and repeat it despite negative consequences and past efforts to quit. Addicts want -- and try -- to stop, but they simply can't. That is the fundamental difference between the addict and someone who just wants to get off.

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39 comments
watermelon53
watermelon53

With any luck these sleazy scumbags will have the opportunity to meet one of these drunk losers on a road one night and see the damage they're causing. Keep the cops in line, but this legal trickery is getting people killed.

Lowwider
Lowwider

I was not drunk and Flood did not help at all he took my money said we had this then had me plead out

Gallahad
Gallahad

It's a fact, you can't always trust the cops. Google 'Kasi Beutel' from Santa Barbara, CA. She was a shining star on the DUI team until she arrested an investigative reporter. Mr. Flood may not be popular, but he's helping train cops to play by the book. And that really is good for us all.

Sad Dad
Sad Dad

Disgusting. I hope Flood is killed by a drunk driver who gets out of his car and pukes into his bloodied and mangled remains as Flood looses contiousness and dies.

Batsu
Batsu

Great. This douche is proud of endangering all of our lives. Congratulations.

Lynn
Lynn

Fuckin' fab. Drunk drivers go free to cause more potential fatalities of innocents. America's justice system at its finest...

Al W.
Al W.

It makes me happy to know that there are guys like Flood out there that are willing to stand up for our liberties in a court, albeit for a fee. The government's just itching for us to let down our guard and accept these draconian laws so they can take more of our freedoms and rule us like they did in the USSR. The way these laws are written and enforced is insane, and they show that our lawmakers, who swear to uphold the Constitution, apparently don't have to even read the thing over before they take office.

Go Flood, and let's get some rational laws on the books instead of allowing a police state!

Laura
Laura

In the article, it states that Mr. Flood hasn't defended any cases which resulted in major injury or death. I'm not saying it's every okay to drink and drive, and I certainly NEVER drink and drive, but I do have friends who may have 1 or 2 drinks and are certainly not drunk, that could probably be charged with a DUI if pulled over. I don't see a problem with defending those types of cases.

Cees
Cees

Easy solution: Video the lack of coordination.

But what about property damage? I doubt the jury would find it credible that the cop intended to get hit and be hospitalized. The "drunk" is a proven danger on the road and should at least pay for damages and have his license revoked.

Kathi
Kathi

Lets see how much all the money anf fame means to him, when it is his child or family member he has to bury.

Lacey
Lacey

When you have a family member killed by an idiot who didn't have the brains or self control not to drive after drinking, then you can tell me that driving under the influence isn't a big deal. I hope these people get hit by one of their clients. I really do. Where I live, we have the harshest DUI laws in the nation. It makes my blood boil to hear people complaining that they got busted for drinking and driving when they should have been responsible enough not to. It's not anyone's fault but your own that you get arrested. I don't care how many drinks you've had, or how less likely you are to be the one causing fatal accidents. That kind of thinking is ignorant,and doesn't make it okay.

St.Anger561
St.Anger561

Where was this guy when I got my dui?!?!? I lawyered up but with the wrong one. He was buddy buddy with the DA and was not really concerned about fighting my charge. You live what you learn. That is why I don't drink and drive anymore, it was an expensive lesson!

bradley
bradley

Wow. Awesome. It turns out all you need is thousands of dollars to get this dick to do his job.

Buck Stevens
Buck Stevens

Lord PLEASE forgive me for thinking this, but i can't wait until someone has an opprotunity to sue this attorney for allowing a drunk driver to remain on the streets and kill someone. It would be even better if a drunk driver would hit her, kill someone in her family or someone in the firm! That will be the actual Judgement Day!

Seems like it would be much better use of their time to educate officers the pitfalls they see so that NO ONE gets off and we can stop the madness.

BS

dario
dario

Come on people, this is just an article - freedom of speech, and an interesting one at that. I myself find it informative unlike some of you self-righteous and close minded people. Some of you fail to understand that this could happen to almost anybody. How many of you use cellphones while driving, I see many people driving reckless while they carry a conversation on one. Do you people really believe that some of these officers are always truthful, and that maybe they are not driven by any other motives. I am not condoning the actions of the drivers but I'm glad there is someone keeping the law in check, that's not often the case.

Eddie Cortes, Attorney at Law
Eddie Cortes, Attorney at Law

And during Closing Arguments the Judge will usually instruct the Jury that whatever the attorneys SAY is not evidence. That they are to limit their deliberations to the evidence presented and the testimony taken.

Interesting that commentator Mike thinks that the Assistant District Attorneys are "dumb enough to believe them." Obviously he has never dealt with the Harris County District Attorney's Office. They are some of the most highly skilled, well trained trial lawyers in one of the most, if not the most, aggressive DA's Office in the country. They are a lot of things, but "dumb" is not one of them.

More importantly, one of the most valuable things one has as an attorney is his reputation. He has a certain amount of professional equity with each court and each prosecutor that he deals with. If an assistant district attorney catches him in a lie, intentional or because his client was lying to him, she will not believe another word that comes out of his mouth. That is detrimental to both the attorney AND the defendant...and both professionally and from a business stand point, the last thing in the world you want as a lawyer is to be viewed as something less than a straight shooter.

Mike goes on to say that a "witness on this case lied..." How he can be so certain of this not knowing all the facts or testing the veracity of the witness on the day of trial in front of a jury, I'll never know. Apparently he knows better than the six people who were sitting in judgment. But my question is this: how does he know it wasn't the cop that was less than truthful? Does Mike have a predisposition to believe the testimony of police officers rather than average citizens? Does he think they are more truthful than the average Joe Blow just because they have a badge and a gun? One thing I know for sure, Mr. Flood did not "tell" her what to say. We can't. As Officers of the Court we are ethically prohibited from telling a witness what to say...and there are sanctions for such behavior.

Again, easy to pick on but difficult to substantiate once you look at all the facts......

Mike
Mike

The attorneys do not testify directly, but when they make closing statements, they can make up whatever they want... They will lie to prosecuting attorneys who are dumb enough to believe them.So much for an oath.. A witness on this case lied. Does anyone really think that Flood would have put her on the stand without coaching what to tell her?????

John S Hickman
John S Hickman

I am truly glad to see drunk drivers get the representation the constitution offers. I hope Tyler defends the drunk who runs over his wife and kids with the same zeal he has offed his other clients.

EC_Esq
EC_Esq

What these negative commentators seem to forget is that drinking and driving IS NOT ILLEGAL! You can still have a glass of wine with dinner in this country and drive yourself home. You can have a glass of champagne at your daughter's wedding reception and not have to call a cab. You can have a beer at your friend's BBQ and not have to have someone pick you up. That is not, and should not be against the law. And if you want to make that illegal, then what you're really asking for is Prohibition...and we all know how well that worked out.

What most people don't understand is that this statute is written so BROADLY, that you could take two benadryl for your allergies and be arrested for DUI if you get behind the wheel. It is a HUGE net that is being cast and it is taking with it a large number of innocent people. People that deserve to be defended by the likes of Tyler Flood.

Remember people, attorneys are not magicians. In nearly all of these cases Mr. Flood was able to convince a jury of 6 reasonable, objective, 3rd party observers that had no vested interest in the case that there was another, reasonable explanation for his client's behavior. You want to get rid of the Jury System? You want to replace with these zealots who have lost loved ones in tragic accidents? Go ahead. But don't call it Justice.

Eddie Cortes, Attorney at Law
Eddie Cortes, Attorney at Law

Officer Egdorf, admittedly biased when enforcing DWI laws, stated, "Defense attorneys lie. They lie their asses off. He's the only person in there that's not sworn to tell the truth."

I would like to remind Officer Egdorf and others that attorneys DO NOT TESTIFY; therefore they cannot "tell" the jury anything. They are there to cross-examine and interrogate. They are there to ASK questions, not make statements.

Furthermore, he is mistaken when he says that attorneys are the only ones not sworn to tell the truth in the courtroom. In order to be licensed we must take an oath: an oath that includes being candid with the tribunal (court). In fact, we are the ONLY profession that provides sanctions for not being truthful. We cannot even put on a witness if we know they are going to give false testimony.

I could cite case after case where officers perjured themselves on the stand or obfuscated the truth. But I will not do so. I will simply say this, it is easy to bad mouth lawyers, but I guarantee you if YOU or one of YOUR loved ones was in trouble you'd want someone who would do battle for you and as Mr. Silverman put it, "Tries cases."

Dane
Dane

I hope, and I say it with all sincerity, that one of your loved ones is hit and maimed by one of your defendants. You are getting repeat offenders off on theatrical talent alone. And I wish the same on all of your fellow DWI lawyers.There is no such things as a first offender DWI. Just a first time CAUGHT DWI.

Tim O'Connor
Tim O'Connor

What a racket DWI is. I am tickled at how much Trichter emphasizes in his ads that he is looking for all the drivers who have been INCORRECTLY arrested for DWI.

I am sure Flood has his share of clients that he hopes never occupy the same road as him. He'll have to live with the deaths of innocent drivers when one of his clients kills somebody.

That said, the roadside gymnastics are garbage. I couldn't do those sober due to a problem with my ankle. DONT BLOW!

Rachel
Rachel

The article doesn't paint a very pretty picture of this guy does it? Yowza!

Penal Code 37.02
Penal Code 37.02

So Tukanov and Lena each had a "couple of glasses" and then Lena swore Tukanov had no more than "1/2 glasses." Sort of seems like perjury to me.

Why on earth would a competent attorney violate attorney / client privilege, assuming client waived, and expose the witness to perjury investigation?

CAK
CAK

Was this the biggest portrayal of I�m a douche bag attorney who needs to boost about my wardrobe, and trophy wife because he�s a real small fish in a big pond of legitimate criminal defense attorneys? The article shouldn�t have been headed, �Getting Off� it should have been called �Jerk Off�

Releasing this ridiculous farce of propaganda is irresponsible journalism� and who the hell buys their hair products at CVS?

Michael
Michael

Though Flood seems obnoxious & conceded throughout this article he is most certainly an essential part of our legal system & probably not a bad representation of it overall. I have dealt with overzealous cops who wanted to arrest me for having one beer, I was lucky I know many others who were not so. I am all for arresting drunk drivers, but I�m also glad theirs people out there defending them.

Pat
Pat

I'm quite sure at least one of the positive commentators is actually Tyler. Probably both.

Nick
Nick

What entrepreneur isn't a "self-promoter"? Isn't that how you succeed in business? As far as "helping others" - all that business would suggest he's doing something right.

Travis
Travis

This guy is a shameless self promoter. My guess is the two positive comments were written by himself. I know lawyers, some of them criminal lawyers, who take their jobs very seriously and help a lot of people in the process. This guy is more interested in representing himself.

Nick
Nick

These lawyers, and Tyler, defend your constitutional rights. You could get a DWI after one beer, you could get accused of a murder you didn't do. Just because you get accused does not mean your guilty people.

James
James

Don't be mad at Tyler Flood, people. Do you really think the people driving after a beer or two are the ones involved fatal car wrecks? But those are the people often getting arrested, charged, and convicted where they're represented by attorneys other than Tyler Flood. It could be you in jail for no reason. And as for the few cases where the driver was "drunk as a skunk," well, if there's no evidence that he was "drunk as a skunk," it's a criminal lawyer's job to argue just that - there's no evidence. That's what defending constitutional liberties and rights is all about. They're your rights too, you know. Respect yourself.

DNay
DNay

This is the dumbest thing I have ever read, and whoever published this article should be slapped. Try promoting NOT DRINKING AND DRIVING vs. drink and drive and KILL SOMEONE then get out of it with Mr. Flood. What a sad world. Mr Flood- how would you feel if your family were the ones in the car that got plowed by a drunk driver. would you defend them???

sue
sue

how do any of these lawyers sleep at night?

Gore Lando
Gore Lando

shut the fuck up you stupid cunt

Batsu
Batsu

...I don't recall driving drunk, or even driving at all, to be a liberty or mentioned at all in the constitution. In fact, driving a motor vehicle on a public-paid road is a privilege (which is why you can be fined for not following the rules), so stop talking nonsense.

DocChaos
DocChaos

And prosecuting attorneys aren't interested in themselves? Cops aren't interested in how they look when an accused walks free?

Attorneys are loaded with ego, but don't think that only applies to defense attorneys. In an adversarial legal system, there is no one trying to prove you innocent except your attorney and your private or attorney's investigator.

I'm happy see you know some criminal lawyers. I think so too.

JH GordonJoe Detectivehttps://www.smashwords.com/boo...

DocChaos
DocChaos

There's another dynamic the article fails to mention. Me. I spent lots of time as an attorney's investigator honing my craft. I can think of no case where an arresting officer didn't do at least something wrong. And that's not just on DUI cases either.

I'll tell you a secret; cops lie. They don't want to lose a case and face their superiors or a pissed off DA. There's a pit-bull mentality that forces justice into a corner all for the sake of a conviction. True, there are drunks on the road. But cops frequently take advantage by confusing people who have only taken a beer or a glass of wine at lunch. I don't like drunk drivers much either. But there has to be something and someone who prevents everyone being ground under the wheels of so-called justice. Here's an other secret, there is no justice.

Laws, all laws, are enforced selectively. That's another place a cop and a prosecutor can run afoul of a jury. It's not hard to show their win record supersedes their wish to see justice done. After the first year, my attorney clients never lost a case either.

JH GordonJoe Detectivehttps://www.smashwords.com/boo...

 
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