He's Got Skillz

V Zilla plays the good host

FRI 4/9

V Zilla has been making sonic waves in the H-town hip-hop scene for some time. "I get really aggressive when I'm putting on a show," he says. "It makes it easy for me to see what moves the crowd." Zilla (formerly known as VG Skillz) will lend his crowd-moving skills to the crew over at the Underground Lounge for a new biweekly event, "Sophistaphunk Fridays," an evening of new-school hip-hop, house, funk, reggae and salsa. "I'm going to be pretty much running the spot," he says. "Basically, what we're trying to do is just bring it back to a sophisticated kind of funk." Local fans of Zilla's rhymes will be disappointed to hear that he won't be dropping any bombs at the club. "For now I'm just going to host, getting everybody into it and hyping the crowd," he says. "I'm going to lay off doing the performance thing for right now, 'cause I've hit the city pretty hard in the last couple of months."

He also hit Europe pretty hard last month. "We did a show in Gothenburg, and these kids in the street saw us unloading the van," he says. "They were looking and looking, and when I turned around, one of the kids caught me in the light in the street and he was like, 'VG Skillz!' And I was like, 'That's crazy. I'm over here in Gothenburg, Sweden, and some kid just recognized who I am.'" 10 p.m. Friday, April 9. 804 Fannin. For information, call 713-225-0948. $5. -- Keith Plocek

V Zilla
Courtesy of FWMJ
V Zilla
The Cadillac's blow job
Daniel Kramer
The Cadillac's blow job
Sha Ross
Mikki Chernoff
Sha Ross

THE CADILLAC BAR'S BLOW JOB

On a recent Friday night, a friend and I were out on the town and decided to grab a bite to eat at the Cadillac Bar (1802 Shepherd, 713-862-2020). She'd been depressed ever since her best friend's wedding more than a month ago. Out of all her buddies, she was the only one left single. To make matters worse, at the Cadillac, we ended up watching a bachelorette party get rather out of control. The liquor must have been flowing for hours, because the girls couldn't stop laughing, and every one of them looked like she was about to hurl. As I came around the corner from the bathroom, one of the bridesmaids announced, "It's time for a blow job!" As one bartender whipped up the shot, another sat on a chair in front of her. This was obviously a popular request. Her hands were behind her back and the shot glass was squeezed between the bartender's knees, and I half expected to hear a drum roll. Instead, just as she bent down and grazed the whipped cream with her lips, some pranksters in the kitchen knocked over what sounded like a hundred metal serving trays. I would have bet the farm she was going to choke, but instead, she managed to get every last drop down her throat -- to the cheers of everyone in the bar. "I've had enough," my friend said. "Can we go home now?" We weren't even out of the parking lot when I felt her hand on my fly.

1-1/4 ounces Kahlúa
3/4 ounce Baileys Irish Cream

Whipped cream

Measure out the booze and top off with whipped cream. Ironically, no hands allowed in this version of the popular pastime. -- J.W. Crooker

Playboy or Bust

WED 4/14

Here's a reason to keep breathing: Show up at a Playboy event and you just may go home with a model. Hey, it's happened before. "A guy who won an auction to shower down one of the Playmates after Jell-O wrestling actually ended up living with her," says Mikki Chernoff, a.k.a. Mikki the Intern, Playboy's local talent scout. The buxom radio personality is hosting a signing party for the magazine's Lingerie Edition. It features local protégée Sha Ross, who recently made mountains out of her molehills when she opted for a boob job on the MTV reality show I Want a Famous Face. 10 p.m. Thursday, April 8. The Luv Shack, 6111 Richmond. For information, call 713-782-1800. Free. -- Steven Devadanam

Old Cool

THU 4/8

You know you're getting old when groups like Nitzer Ebb, Front 242 and Skinny Puppy are considered "classic." For the top half of the 18-to-35 demographic, "Synthtek," a weekly happening at Club Go, is sonic déjà vu. For the young'uns, though, it's a place to escape downtown pretension and catch some synth, future pop, industrial, darkwave, trance and '80s retro tunes. Brad MacAllister of CTRL, the Austin synth band headlining this week's event, promises you'll see "everything from kids in flip-flops or combat boots and military pants to girls in velvet corsets." Catch the eye candy and throbbing backbeats at 9 p.m. Wednesday, April 14. 2001 Commerce. For information, call 281-657-0785. $5. -- Steven Devadanam

 
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