It's like the organizers of the Houston Sports Gala are trying to give you Adult ADD. They've planned a fashion, sports and art event, featuring the launch of a new multimedia networking site, inside a restaurant that combines cuisines from Africa, Asia and the Americas. Having trouble focusing? There's an outside chance that a pharmaceutical company's behind the gala, but its purported host is NexPlayer.com, a soon-to-be-launched Web site where athletes, coaches and other members of the athletic community can meet and market themselves online (think Friendster, for jocks). This Thursday, though, the company is inviting local sports types, from celebrities right on down to plain old fans, to interact in real time (how retro!) while munching on fusion cuisine at Mantra.
In addition to brushing biceps with ballers and shot-callers, guests can enjoy live music and check out the latest sports fashions on live models. A show by local artists including Kat Moon, Shunshieva and Charles Washington will culminate in a silent auction, with proceeds going to NexPlayer.com's scholarship fund and Covenant House Texas. And how's this for a final challenge to your overloaded brain: Organizers ask that you wear "a blend of cocktail attire and fashionable athletic wear." Some things may be better left unfused. 6 p.m. to 8:30 p.m. Thursday, October 7. 711 Main. For information, call 713-528-4NEX. $20. -- Julia Ramey
Cosmos Cafe's Tanqueray and Tonic
I woke up on my girlfriend's floor with shag carpeting stuck in my ear and fake plant leaves glued to my nose. I untangled myself from the living-room drapes and tried to focus on the blinking microwave in the kitchen. It was 10 p.m. Sunshine had long since left for work -- she'd been shaking her silicone birthday gifts for almost four hours now. My dry throat was nastier than the day-old thong lying next to my face, but I picked up a wine-stained baseball cap and headed over to Cosmos Cafe (69 Heights Boulevard, 713-802-2144) for a pick-me-up Tanqueray and tonic. Some fat bastard in a wrinkled flannel shirt was up on stage singing off-key and mumbling through every song. I was halfway through my drink when suddenly I remembered I'd left the macaroni and cheese boiling on the stove! I raced back to the apartment and found I'd set off the smoke detector. And wouldn't you know it, not a single neighbor had bothered to wave his sick, needle-pocked arms for help. With wires from the alarm hanging from the ceiling and a singed pot floating in the toilet, I packed up my toothbrush and got the hell out of there.
2 ounces Tanqueray gin
Flat tonic water
A forgotten lime wedge from the bottom of your refrigerator
Fill a milk glass with ice and measure out the gin. Top off with tonic water and hang a lime on the rim. Try not to down the whole thing in one gulp. -- J.W. Crooker
Wes Walz isn't an alarmist -- or bragger -- by nature. Still, he's dead serious when he says Saturday's "Show Em Whatcha' Got 3" show at the Meridian will be "possibly the last major electronic event Houston will ever see." Under the name Kaos, Walz and partner Lee Lockwood have produced more than 30 shows, some of the hottest being their "Show Em" raves. Now, after three years, the duo's calling it quits and planning to go out with a bang. Expect three headlining DJs spinning trance, "booty" house and drum 'n' bass, plus a high-tech laser show and a veritable who's who of club kids. Kaos's last hurrah kicks off at 9 p.m. Saturday, October 9. 1503 Chartres. For information, call 713-225-1717 or visit www.showemwhatchagot.com. $15 to $20. -- Steven Devadanam
We don't need an excuse to get blasted on a workday, but if the Red Lion Pub is offering one, we'll take it. Mosey on over to the Lion for the Texas Bootlegger's Party benefiting Child Advocates, where you can down some premium, Texas-distilled vodka and schmooze young professionals. Dress "Texan" (we'll let you figure that one out), and you could win a door prize. Your first drink and a T-shirt are complimentary, so you can buy your friends a round and have a change of clothes for the next day. 6:30 p.m. Tuesday, October 12. 2316 South Shepherd. For information, call 713-214-1698, www.redlionhouston.com. $15. -- Steven Devadanam