Righteous Party

Get some Easter Salvation at the Jungle 13 weekend

Typically, Easter morning is ushered in by ringing church bells. But there will be pulsating backbeats at the Salvation After Hours party, just one of the events planned for the infamous Jungle 13 weekend. The annual event is one of the hottest gay happenings of the year, drawing folks from around the state and country, and anyone who wants to shake it will be welcomed with open arms. Salvation After Hours happens in the wee hours of Sunday, March 27, at 3:30 a.m. at M Bar (402 Main). National circuit DJ Alyson Calagna will be on the decks for a night of dancing benefiting local HIV organizations.

Your Salvation consists of music, glitter, lasers and other eye candy, like the Fly Boys Flag Troupe, who'll show off some serious dance moves with performance artist Dynasty. Calagna says she's ready to spin for the late-night, Red Bull-drinking crowd. "There is this certain time where everything just hits," she says. "You feel like you've connected, where you're one with the people." Connected, maybe. But with the kind of, um, stimulants you'll need to attend every one of the events, we predict you'll be seeing the Easter Bunny and Jesus dancing together to sweet house beats.

Other Jungle 13 shows include Gathering the Tribe at 10 p.m. Friday, March 25, at Rich's Houston (2401 San Jacinto, 713-759-9610); DJ-producer Tony Moran with vocalist Kristine W at 10 p.m. Saturday, March 26, at Verizon Wireless Theater (520 Texas); and Tribal Lust at 10 p.m. Sunday, March 27, at South Beach (810 Pacific, www.southbeachthenightclub.com). For advance tickets and information, visit www.spoiledboyz.net or www.junglehouston.com. Single tickets start at $10; weekend passes start at $100. –- Travis Ritter

Kristine W
Courtesy of The Calvin Agency
Kristine W
Hollywood Specialty's triple rum and Coke
Troy Fields
Hollywood Specialty's triple rum and Coke
Xzibit
Courtesy of Open Bar Entertainment
Xzibit

Hollywood Specialty's Triple Rum and Coke

I happened to be downtown getting my boots resoled when I noticed I had a few minutes left on the parking meter. So I scurried into Hollywood Specialty(502 Caroline, 713-236-0947) to grab a quick libation. "No bartender today"What would you like?" A woman named Jennifer scurried behind the bar to tend to my alcoholic needs. "Why don't you give me a triple rum and Coke," I mumbled. She picked up a glass mug as I painstakingly pointed out three different bottles of rum. Judge Larry Joe Doherty, presiding over the courtroom on TV's Texas Justice, quickly ripped my attention away from my concoction. Some lady's three-legged dog -- named Tripod -- was in heat, got impregnated, then up and died. She was suing the owner of the horny male dog for $1,500, for mental anguish. I was laughing so hard I practically pissed in my pants. My drink tasted good and quickly disappeared. As the judge talked about the fate of poor Tripod, the bailiff laughed uncontrollably in the courtroom. I suddenly remembered my car, asked for change and ran outside -- only to find a fresh green envelope on my windshield. Having nothing better to do, I went back inside, ordered another drink and waited for pictures of the dogs having sex.

1 ounce Captain Morgan rum
1 ounce Bacardi Light rum
1 ounce Malibu rum
Splash of Coke

Measure out the rum into an old-fashioned glass mug and top off with Coke. Hold the lime. Goes great with afternoon TV. -- J.W. Crooker

X-Man

THU 3/24

Okay, maybe hosting MTV's Pimp My Rideand starring in Right Guard commercials doesn't exactly scream "thug," but that doesn't mean that rapper Xzibit is a stranger to tha streets. He lost his mom at age nine and was a ward of the state by 17. But he'd soon find himself among L.A.'s rap elite, hangin' with Snoop and Dr. Dre. Xzibit will be in town this week to push his latest album, Weapon of Mass Destruction, so don't bother begging him to trick out your '92 Tercel. Doors open at 7 p.m. Thursday, March 24. 300 Westheimer. For tickets and information, call 713-526-6551 or visit www.numbersnightclub.com. $15 in advance; $17 at the door. -- Steven Devadanam

Rent Control

SAT 3/26

Much like Tara Reid's, Rent's cup runneth over. After outgrowing Helios, the party moved to Union; now it's ditching Union for the more spacious Meridian. Organizers don't mind the change: The monthly event is based on the legendary British parties Cream and Gatecrashers, which were defined by their mobility. The entertainment's still the same: Little Martin, Brotha Jibril and Amanda Robinson will spin house, disco and club classics alongside live Latin percussion. And the Rent folks love you so much, they're bringing in an interior designer to transform Meridian for just one night. Feel special at 9 p.m. Saturday, March 26. 1503 Chartres. For information, call 713-533-9600 or visit www.upsidedownhouse.com. $5 to $10. -- Julia Ramey

 
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