This man's maturation process needs to be impaired, blockaded and ideally halted completely. Guero is a wonderful, innovative, safe album Beck should never make again. As L. Ron Hubbard himself suggested, "Let's get retarded." Get stupid, get ridiculous, get crass, get absurd. Dalí, not Dylan. For I still proudly carry a hyperspecific memory of listening to 1994's "Pay No Mind" while languishing in a Taco Bell drive-thru, guffawing like an idiot when Beck mumbled "Like a giant dildo crushing the sun" as though it were scripture. Because it is, in point of fact, scripture. Please, Satan, sell us another taco.