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Kapusta Kristmas

Thanks to the Internet, you no longer have to be on Al Kooper's holiday list to hear some of the funniest tapes in history

Linkage: www.thefoodsection.com/appetizers/2005/04/orson_welles_on.html

Artist: J&H Productions Backstory: As nearly as I can tell, at some point a guy in Cincinnati just decided he wanted to get into the concert business, and not just as some sweaty stagehand, either. Nope, he was just gonna hop right in at the Louis Messina level, so in a bold, visionary effort to transform his life, he sent this tape-recorded résumé/statement of intent to several bigwigs in the industry.

Excerpt: "I want the stars that's gonna be in the coliseums that's gonna make the people sway and rock and clap their hands to the beat and get up and dance in a area that will be big enough for them to do it in."

Linkage: What little info there is on this ambitious mystery man is here: www.timharrod.com/jhhome.html. Make sure you click part two of the link immediately after part one. Trust us. Also, a New York funk collective by the name of Prophet Omega (see below) has adapted the J&H cassette into song here: www.prophetomega.net/music.html.

Artist: Prophet Omega Backstory: The "founder and overseer" of the Peaceway Temple in Nashville, Tennessee, Prophet Omega was the singularly soulful old-school preacher who inspired the group above to take his name, and their remix of his "I Am What I Am" sermonette found its way onto the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy series soundtrack. But that's just the beginning -- the Alpha for this Omega. In addition, Adrian Belew made a prog-rock remake of "I Am What I Am," and both the Charlie Hunter album Right Now Move and the Jay Bennett song "Courtesy Move" take their names from the Prophet's one-minute radio spot for the Shipp Moving Company. Hunter also borrowed another Omega-ism -- Friends Seen and Unseen -- for another of his album titles, and that title is shared with an award-winning half-hour documentary wherein a bevy of musicians including Marty Stuart and Belew discuss their love of the Prophet.

Excerpt: "I am what I am, and that's all that I am, and I am it."

Linkage: The "I Am What I Am" sermon and the Shipp Moving Company ad, plus his ad for the J&B Boutique, are all at www.bedazzled.blogs.com/bedazzled/2005/10/the_prophet_ome.html. (Here you will also find a couple more gems from the Kooper tapes that space won't allow us to discuss here -- the "One Good Turn Deserves Another" one is especially hilarious.) There is yet another remix of the sermon here -- www.paleomusic.com/receive.htm -- this one an Asian-Western fusion. Info on the documentary is here: www.genuinehuman.com/friends_seen_and_unseen.html. And, as the Prophet would say, "So much for that."

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