Cred Sheet

Stuff you need to know to avoid musical ostracism

File this one under "Stuff you need to know about to avoid musical ostracism." Cred Sheet is a periodic gauge of cultural stimuli for those unwilling or unable to think about this shit for a living 24/7. (Note: These people are most often smarter and better compensated than those who are willing and able to do so.) It seeks to be a reliable fount of valuable info and ostensible humor. Clip it out and take it along to speed-dating engagements as a valuable icebreaker and greased pathway to "The Coitus."

Abrupt Alt-Rock Resurgence

The frightening realization that the best power-pop record of 2006 is the Gin Blossoms' Major Lodge Victory.

Paving the way for the great Spin Doctors revival.

Strange Bedfellows

Jay-Z and Dale Earnhardt Jr.: What do you think these two talked about between takes on the set of Jay's new video?

Probably Project Runway.

Album of the Year This Week

The frigid, unstoppable brilliance of Junior Boys' So This Is Goodbye.

"In the Morning" is the jam.

Wanton Emasculation

Getting punched out on stage by Jeff Fucking Tweedy.

Infinitely more humiliating than Nolan Ryan vs. Robin Ventura.

Economic Indicator

The ignoble demise of Tower Records.

Funeral bouquets of plastic flowers will be manufactured for a dime apiece and retail at $18.99.

Cathartic Band Breakup

The drug-addled demise of the Darkness.

Contrary to prior belief, one cannot snort cocaine ironically.

Technological Marvel

The Internet's abysmal failure to produce a halfway-decent Blood Brothers song-title generator.

Just rig a fill-in-the-blanks form combining naive, childlike whimsy with unimaginable violence -- e.g., "You're the Dream Unicorn," or "Set Fire to the Face on Fire." (Gonna be hard to beat "Huge Gold AK-47," though.)

Internet Distraction

The way Rick James says "What you got against Shawwwwwn Cassidy?" in the "Battle of the Album Covers" video.

Better impression than Dave Chappelle.

Cred Sheet is a new weekly column by Rob Harvilla.

 
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