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5ingles: The Breeders, Mariah Carey, Lupe Fiasco, Madonna, Hannah Montana

The Breeders "Bang On"Kim Deal would like you to know that she's lonely in the biblical sense, but wipe that smirk off your face — we don't mean it that way — and she's saying so in a lazy, bare-bones way. Sort of an alt-rock Peanuts comic strip yawn, I guess.

Mariah Carey "Touch My Body" — So Mariah's cool with the sentiments N.E.R.D. expressed on "Tape You," but post her doin'-the-do on YouTube and she'll "hunt you down." Since Mimi's like a full-grown sex kitten with a sixth-grader's mentality, that threat's just aw-shucks cute — and won't impede the continuing parade of XXX-rated fantasies her videos and pictorials encourage. Purists hate, rightfully, because Carey doesn't explore her usual upper-upper register range; any number of other songbirds could've swung this.

Lupe Fiasco "Go Baby" — Hip-hop's ­second-most-famous skate-rat tosses a hearty "you go, girl" anthem into a world overcongested with "do-me" for-the-ladies tracks, which is (a) dope if your dude kicks off your new mixtape with it and (b) dull-but-useful if you're the dude in question. I wish Lupe didn't sound so out-to-lunch here; it's like he laid down the vocals while signing autographs or something. Props for the dorked-out metaphor involving Maury Povich, though.

 Madonna feat. Justin Timberlake and Timbaland "4 Minutes" — It clocks in at three minutes, nine seconds — not four minutes, capiche? Before I even downloaded this single, I knew it was a bad idea. I'm holding out for an expensive video where they're all dressed up as superheroes — maybe Wonder Woman, The Flash, and The Hulk? — trying to prevent Sean Bean from blowing up L.A. while throwing down in danceclubs. Highlight: Timba­land addressing Madge as "MaDONuh!"

 Hannah Montana "East Northumberland High" — My youngest niece's favorite pop-star-cum-TV-personality gets all mean and succinct and tells some joker to step off because, like, they're not in high school anymore and she's grown up and realized he's a dillweed and stuff. But I don't hate it, you know? It's like phasers-set-to-cash-in Liz Phair-era Liz Phair that isn't trying to gross me out.

 
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