BIG WOODROW'S SEX WITH AN ALLIGATOR

The NBA playoffs are a blast to watch, no matter what team is playing. And one of my favorite places to take in a game is Big Woodrow's (3111 Chimney Rock, 713-784-2653). The service is usually top-notch, and the busboys wear T-shirts imprinted with "shy guy with a big woodrow," which always makes me laugh. Last Sunday I parked myself at the bar to revel in some very large men running, sweating and scoring. The weather was amazing, the place was hopping and I had a perfect view of the television. The only thing missing was a cocktail, so impish Kevin and reluctant Jeff put their heads together to come up with something special for me, Sex with an Alligator — a very scary-looking shot that actually looked like reptile piss. Made with Jägermeister, it was a bit too strong for me. I didn't want to start double dribbling, so I opted for just one. After the game, my fellow fans and I headed out to the parking lot, and what did we find but a Houston police car waiting to screw with someone — what a buzz-kill. I would call that an intentional foul.

1/2 ounce melon liquor

Splash sweet & sour

1/2 ounce raspberry liquor

1/2 ounce Jägermeister

Shake the first two ingredients and pour into a shot glass. Add the raspberry liquor; it should sink to the bottom of the glass. Float the Jägermeister on top. Shoot, then score.