Nothing is sacred to monologist/essayist David Sedaris as he gives Christmas a solid kick in the ass, memorializing his temp days as Crumpet the Elf at Macy's department store in Santaland Diaries. Toyland is hell, parents are worse and children should be killed. Nothing is as funny as Todd Waite in his degrading, ersatz velvet costume, unless it's Paul Hope in his. (Hope takes over this weekend's performances, on December 9, 10 and 11.) To be peed on by rotten little monsters is humiliating, but to be chewed up and spit out by rampant consumerism in the name of Christ while wearing pointed shoes is downright hilarious. Through December 31. Alley Theatre, 615 Texas, 713-228-8421.
Find everything you're looking for in your city
Find the best happy hour deals in your city
Get today's exclusive deals at savings of anywhere from 50-90%
Check out the hottest list of places and things to do around your city
