Dr. Brown's Dubai Detention

Sex toys get hand doc in trouble

CRIME

The Hand Doctor's Dildos
Sex toys in Dubai land TV doc in trouble

By Craig Malisow

We don't know how we missed this, but cocaine-using, wife-beating, medical-license-losing ex-hand surgeon Michael Brown was detained in Dubai earlier this year when authorities there confiscated "sexual paraphernalia, sex videos and other objects" in his suitcase.

The allegation is included in a June breach of contract lawsuit filed by Stephen Payne in Harris County District Court. Payne alleges that Brown abruptly backed out of a deal Payne had brokered to open a "hand surgery center in Dubai." Payne alleges that the last-minute termination damaged his personal and professional reputation.

But the good stuff is in Payne's claim of tortious interference, to wit: "Brown created an incident upon entering the Country of the UAE in Dubai with [Payne] by having sexual paraphernalia, sex videos and other objects which were confiscated from Brown's suitcase by Dubai authorities. This led to Brown being detained for over four hours. [Payne] and the local partners had to intercede with the government authorities to have Brown released and his passport returned...Brown's action was without the knowledge of [Payne]."

Brown filed a "general denial" of the claim, which unfortunately does not clarify exactly what "objects" Brown did or did not have in his suitcase of wonder.

Brown was charged with assault in August for allegedly grabbing his fourth wife's arm and bending "it behind her back and twist[ing] it as if he meant to break her arm." So far, Rachel Brown has fared better than Wife No. 3, whom Brown beat with a broken bedpost and dragged down the stairs while she was seven months pregnant.

As we noted in an earlier article, "Brown pleaded no contest to aggravated assault. He came home drunk and dragged [his wife] — seven months pregnant — down the stairs by her hair, investigators said. She locked herself in the bathroom of their Woodlands home and dialed 911 while he fired shots through the door. Brown says he was just trying to gain access to the phone to tell police he wasn't trying to kill his wife."

He, of course, is famous in Houston and other cities for his warm, loving television ads for the Hand Center, which feature him dandling an infant on his knee. (Since his latest run-in with the law, he hasn't been showing up in the advertisements, however.)

Hey, remember — go to the Brown Hand Center and they'll "treat you like family." But you might have to bring your own dildo.
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CRIME

Galleria Upskirting

by Richard Connelly

Hey gals!! You ever pay for anything at this Shell station at Westheimer and the West Loop?

If so, you may have had a lovely upskirt shot taken of you! And let's hope you didn't ask to use the employee bathroom, or you had a chance to really be a video star.

Godfrey Bacerra, 26, an employee of the store, has been charged with illegal videotaping and photography.

We've taken a look at the court documents, and if the allegations are true, Bacerra was an industrious guy.

A female customer came into the store last month, a Houston cop says in the probable cause statement, and asked to use the employee restroom. Bacerra told her to wait while he made sure it was clean, and then spent two minutes in the stall-less facility.

When the woman was about her business, she saw a camera at the sink pointing right at her.

She took it home, found pictures of other peeing women, not to mention Bacerra himself installing it, and contacted the cops.

"There is also a recording of the Defendant," the court document says, "setting up the device near the area where customers pay at the register, and angled so that it would record images up the skirts of female customers." (What, only up the skirts of female customers?")

Bond was set at $2,000.
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Doing It Daily

There’s tons of stuff each day on the Houston Press blogs; you’re only getting a taste of it here in the print edition. Head to blogs.houstonpress.com/hairballs (or “/rocks” or “eating” or “/artattack”).

Education

We broke the story of a former Houston school board member who got accused in a lawsuit of bid-rigging. A conservative group took a look at Rice and was aghast at Democrat-donating professors and courses involving Queer Theory that undermined Real American Values. And two Texas principals lost their fight to get lawsuits against them dismissed that sought damages for banning Jesus pencils and Christian candy canes at elementary-school holiday class parties.

Crime

An East Texas man tried to rob a giant pink bunny, without success. And a Texas company was accused in diplomatic cables publicized by WikiLeaks of paying for underage boys for Afghan warlords, a charge the company denied. And Harris County District Attorney Pat Lykos's office got a civil ­injunction against the Crips and the Bloods.

Sports

Dandy Don Meredith died, and we offered five reasons to mourn the passing, even for non-Cowboy fans. The Texas Bowl match-up was announced; good for Baylor fans, not that great for others. We also saluted Larry Bird's birthday by offering a video collection of signature plays by the greats of the NBA's tight-shorts era.

Art Attack

We examined the surprising connections linking Kanye West and avant-garde composer John Cage. We took a nostalgic look back at our favorite Playboy holiday issues. We recommended our favorite gifts for geeks on Etsy.com. And we offered some suggestions for how the Rothko Chapel could spice up its 40th anniversary in 2011 (hint: install a trampoline).

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