The Tea Party Democrat

Party leaders want to throw out District Attorney candidate Lloyd Oliver and the donkey he rode in on.

I met him at his truck. Lloyd was sweating and putting on an American flag tie. He had to meet several clients at the courthouse, and his spirits were again high. He wanted to talk about the campaign and his opponent. Mike Anderson, he reminded lest I'd forgotten, is a tyrant. And that doctor? he said. "It's easy for him to stay in such shape. He's got that gym right there. It's easy when you have that, and a wife making all your meals for you." I asked Lloyd if he wished he still had a wife.

"Excuse me, are you ever lonely? What, about ten minutes out of the day? Big deal! Am I lonely? Do I get depressed? Maybe about ten minutes a day. The rest of it, I'm a happy guy. I enjoy myself. I do what I want to do. How could it get any better than this? I don't have some woman ragging on me all the time, making me do shit. I do what I want to, when I want to."

The vulnerabilities of the morning had vanished. And Lloyd was again playing Lloyd Oliver.
_____________________

Lloyd Oliver shakes hands with Harris County Republican Chairman Jared Woodfill. Woodfill says he's had a good laugh over the Democrats' failed attempt to force Lloyd off the ticket.
Troy Fields
Lloyd Oliver shakes hands with Harris County Republican Chairman Jared Woodfill. Woodfill says he's had a good laugh over the Democrats' failed attempt to force Lloyd off the ticket.
Lloyd Oliver, who calls himself the Tea Party Democrat, addresses a recent Tea Party rally. Says Lloyd: "I already got the Democrats. I need to get the Republicans."
Troy Fields
Lloyd Oliver, who calls himself the Tea Party Democrat, addresses a recent Tea Party rally. Says Lloyd: "I already got the Democrats. I need to get the Republicans."

The next day, several men conspired around an oak conference table and drank weak coffee. Lloyd was at some friends' law offices on Texas, getting advice. In an hour, he had a debate with Mike Anderson on the local PBS show Red, White and Blue. The men wondered what questions Lloyd would get. Would the indictments come up? They'd heard local Democrat David Jones, who despises Lloyd, was the moderator and were worried what would happen.

Lloyd's entire campaign staff was also present. It's a staff of one — Justin Silver, 23, whom Lloyd hasn't been keen on from the get-go. Lloyd said he's never asked — too embarrassed — but has quietly wondered whether Silver is a homosexual. Silver, who is indeed gay, said Lloyd's reservations don't bother him. Even if Lloyd knew about his sexuality, he said, he doubts he would be treated differently. Lloyd's a good man, Silver said, and places him in a historical context. He perhaps does this to lend Lloyd a measure of absolution. He's from another time, Silver said. Lloyd is who he is.

But that was exactly what had Lloyd so concerned on the ride over to the debate. He expressed trepidation over how people would perceive him. He admitted he's politically incorrect. Is it wrong to use the word "faggot?" Or to call those who work on domestic violence "Nazi feminists?" More than anything, Lloyd said, he was worried about letting everyone down. He was scared to fail. "You know, I'm not a fearless man. What if I came away after a four-year stint in office as being a bozo and a clown? I'd be so ashamed."

But it's as though Lloyd can't help himself. He was, after all, driving around with a handicapped dangler hanging from his rearview mirror even though he's not handicapped. And when he got to the debate at the University of Houston, he joked with a receptionist that he couldn't remember why he was there, and then scrawled "no idea" on the sign-in form. It's as though he doesn't understand how foolish such antics — though perhaps endearing — would make a 69-year-old man look.

Mike Anderson, Lloyd saw on the sign-in sheet, had already arrived. This made Lloyd nervous. He said he didn't like that Anderson had showed up before him, and wandered away in a minor fright. He avoided Anderson, who had settled his tall and wiry frame into a cushioned chair in a small room for makeup. Anderson, a district judge for 12 years, is an adroit politician: "I'm going to leave the name-calling to Lloyd," he said. "If I'm at a campfire, we make jokes. But the stakes are too high for that. When you're making a decision on the death penalty, you take it seriously. Dropping playground one-liners is not the behavior I want out of my district attorney."

David Jones materialized in Anderson's room, face orange with foundation. He said he was going to punish Lloyd in the upcoming debate. Jones was jumpy and wouldn't sit still. He was going to bring up the barratry allegations, he said. We were to all watch Lloyd squirm.

Soon after, Anderson, Lloyd, Jones and the Republican moderator, Gary Polland, crowded around a raised table and the cameras rolled. Jones, who would otherwise side with the Democratic nominee, immediately got all over Lloyd. "The Democrats tried to run (you) off," Jones said. "They did...So now, Lloyd, you get to earn my vote back — if you can."

But of course Lloyd couldn't. He stumbled. His words wouldn't come out right. He lost his temper and blustered. He repeated his line that for some people, a man beating a woman is a "prelude to lovemaking." Jones kept after him. He said Lloyd was "hustling" cases outside the courthouse, and questioned his ethics. Anderson's spokesperson, Sara Kinney, rolled her eyes and mouthed, "He's so bad." The pummeling went on and on.

After it was over, Lloyd thanked Jones for the "hack job" and was surprisingly content. He thought he'd done pretty well. He wished he could have used his Tea Party Democrat bit, but otherwise thought his performance had been a grand success. Though about that Jones, he said, "what a prick."

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18 comments
XXXx
XXXx

Terrence deserves a prize for this,  fucking find one for him now. It's so Houston, it's so sweaty. This is the finest piece of pol journalism and COMEDY of 2012. Please turn this into a screenplay if you haven't already, sir.

blomejj
blomejj

That sounded evil to me too.  We hear a respected professor saying crazy stuff like that.  I wonder if just a portion of his thesis was stated out of context.  This stuff about this Arab bragging that he bought Lloyd Oliver's opponent for $5k confirmed my suspicions.  I guess Lloyd was waiting for some concrete proof, before he could release what was already obvious to those close to the system.  Michael Anderson has promised returns for the $700K that opportunists invested in his campaign.  What do you want to bet Lloyd's opponent won't return the $5K or donate it to a worthy cause?  Justice has always been for sale in Harris County.  It is just that the buyers consisted of a smaller tight knit group during the Holmes-Rosenthall era.

ZubenElGenubi
ZubenElGenubi

I rarely am surprised by the behaviour of politicians or lawyers nowadays, so the revelations of Mr. Oliver were not earth-shaking.

 

The one sentence that really knocked me over was this: 

 

"Rice University Political Scientist Bob Stein said he suspects it was because Lloyd's name sounds blacker."

 

There's one of two conclusions one can take away from this statement.  A) Mr. Stein is a racist or B) the African-American electorate do not make educated voting decisions (i.e., voting by name only).

 

Which is it?  While the article addresses straight-ticket voting, it does not satisfactorily explain how Mr. Oliver was elected in the Democratic primary in the first place.  

blomejj
blomejj

Where did the $400K come from that the maid found in Johnny Holmes freezer?  Constituents have been voting for dirty public officials that are tied to family fortunes for the longest.  How has that worked.  Look at retired judge Dibrell in Galveston County?

andy434
andy434

Great article about this pathetic cartoon character masquerading as a man. Mike Anderson is much more conservative than I am, but he's been my friend for more than 25 years and he's going to run a good office. And anyone who thinks Johnny Holmes was bought and paid for knows nothing about the man or his family fortune. Johnny was too rich to be bought even if he hadn't been too honorable.

redeyecarl
redeyecarl

@HoustonPress @TexasObserver pls. send this link 2 those clubs that prefer original songs in Americana style... http://t.co/cbHfSRJj

blomejj
blomejj

We know that Lloyd Oliver's opponent is bought and paid for by the same entities who owned the Holmes and Rosenthal administrations.   You are very kind Anse and your point is well taken.  Lloyd Oliver can lead the Harris County DIstrict Attorneys Office without the money and connections.  He would have to be dirty to use connections in the same manner as his opponent.  All he needs to do is get elected.  Than it is up to him to hire good chiefs.  There are plenty, who are ready, willing and able,  to pick from.  Other than taking orders from the people who paid at least $700K to Anderson, Lloyd Oliver's opponent does not know how to take advice from the experts who actually run the huge office.  Lloyd knows how to take advice from others and I expect him to do a good job of this once he is elected.  He promises not to over prosecute infractions of the law, while concentrating his efforts on major crimes, especially those committed through corruption.  Lloyd is a generalist, not a specialist.  That is what we need.

Anse
Anse

This dude is a piece of work. But honestly, give this guy money and connections, get rid of his gut, and he could be Rick Perry.

ScottS
ScottS

Lloyd Oliver was my attorney in a custody suit in Fort Bend County in the 1990's.  I hired and fired 3 Fort Bend attorneys who I was told could get me through the good ol boy system there.  They couldn't.  I got hooked up with Lloyd through a good friend and Lloyd got me through the process with the best possible outlook for me and for my child.  He is a good guy, a straight shooter, and an honest lawyer.  If you find yourself needing an attorney I would highly recommend him.

 

He has some interesting opinions as described well in this article, but he would make a big impact on a terrible DA's office staff.

 

Good luck Lloyd if you happen to read this and I know you will do a great job if you win this election.

hwalsh10284
hwalsh10284

Based on what is said here, and who knows if its true, I find that I don't agree with him on many issues.  That said I would vote for him because he does not mince words.  With him in office you would know exactly where he stands.  When was the last time you had someone in office who was straight forward?  Now if all politicians were as outspoken we would truely have a representative government not this bastardization we have now where noone on either side does what they say they will do.

miyashay
miyashay

@terrence_mccoy well written @HoustonPress on Lloyd! cc: @thecatarina

Bradley
Bradley

Lloyd Oliver is a good man.  The Republican candidate spreads all this untrue stuff, because Lloyd has promised to prosecute corrupt politicians.  Lloyd's opponent is one of them. 

Gretel
Gretel

I'm speechless. What an amazing story about a truely horrible human being. Way to go Democrats...pay attention next time! Please!!

Wyatt
Wyatt

Wow...great story.

Anse
Anse

@blomejj lmao

Wyatt
Wyatt

 @Bradley The Republican candidate spread what stuff? This story comes from spending time with the guy. And while interesting as a human being, he also sounds like a misogynistic, homophobic, racist goober.

 

Or are you suggesting the Republican candidate dressed up like Lloyd Oliver and tricked a reporter into believing he was him, then said all of that terrible shit?

 
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