Street Knowledge

The Geto Boys MC is also Rocks Off's brand-new advice columnist.

Ask Willie D:


I have joint custody of my son. I love him to death, but his mom, my ex-wife, is driving me away from him by constantly trying to push my button wanting to argue. I'm trying to be peaceful for my son, but I'm thinking about getting out of his life before I snap on her. What should I do? — Sheldon Young

Our new advice columnist
Courtesy of Willie D
Our new advice columnist
Jay-Z's music "just doesn't seem appealing to me, not even for entertainment purposes," says a woman on our panel.
Marco Torres
Jay-Z's music "just doesn't seem appealing to me, not even for entertainment purposes," says a woman on our panel.

Wow. Sheldon, that's a heartbreaker, homie. I can tell you what I wouldn't do quicker than I can tell you what I would do. Under no circumstances would I abandon my son. When my son Blake was born, it was the second proudest moment of my life — the first being the birth of my daughter Caen.

Not knowing in advance what his gender would be, when he was being delivered and I saw his jewels, I was so happy that I dropped his mother's leg and yelled so loud that all of the doctors and nurses working the graveyard shift in the maternity ward came rushing into the room.

I can't see how some men could voluntarily miss the opportunity to witness the child they helped to create come to life, let alone not be involved in the nurturing and development of them.

Whatever you do, don't snap. They got expensive lawyers and correctional facilities with hard cots, funky cellmates and nasty food for that. If you can't trust your temper when she pushes your buttons, you should probably arrange for a family member or close friend to meet with her at a designated location away from your home to receive or drop him off to her.

If he has a game or is in a play at school, sit as far away from her as possible. If he has a birthday party, take him a gift, snap a few pictures and burn off.

Distancing yourself from your son's mother doesn't mean you have to distance yourself from him. You don't want him to think when a man has issues with a woman, the first thing he does is lose his cool and neglect his ­responsibilities.

I don't care how difficult the relationship is, walking out of your son's life is not an option and laying hands on his mother may not turn out like you think.


I have only been dating my guy for a year, and I already feel like the love is lost. He doesn't bring me flowers, he doesn't call to meet for lunch and he is only interested in sex about once a week. He used to be the most romantic man I had ever been with. He says that nothing is wrong, he is just tired. Should I end it because it is a lost cause that will only go downhill from here, or should I hang on in hopes that the love will rebound? — Katie

Katie, don't you dare think about touching that doorknob. Turn your sexy butt around and take a warm shower. When you're done, reach into that closet and find something nice to wear, and spray on some Bond No. 9, then go directly to wherever your man is. If prying eyes prevent you from being intimate on site, find an alternative location and put it on him like you was a dancer auditioning for a Beyoncé video.

All of us — males and females — go the extra mile when the relationship is fresh. As with a new car, we pay attention to detail and are careful not to damage it. But after we've driven it for a while and the newness wears off, we become complacent, carelessly hitting potholes, getting dings and not keeping it as clean as we used to.

I'm not in your home, but I'm sure there are things you used to do that your man appreciated that you no longer do. To expect anyone to be their same great, perfect self months or even years into a relationship is not realistic, and if you leave them to date someone else because the spice is missing, don't be surprised if you find yourself in the same situation chasing that new-car scent.

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Rocks Off

Recently, as a sort of experiment, Rocks Off asked ten of our male contributors to ask a woman in their life — wife, girlfriend, ex-girlfriend, even a close friend, just not a blood relation — to name one band or artist they simply cannot abide.

What a great question, right? Easy to answer but almost impossible to agree on. Some answers came back almost right away in replies that seemed almost reflexive, while others took a few days and came in the form of carefully considered paragraphs.

Either way, it was clear that the women we asked did not require much prompting at all.

Blink-182: "Because [of] their extreme whininess."

Chris Brown: "Why is Chris Brown still famous?"

The Cure: I hate the Cure. I hate them. And everyone — everyone — used to assume that just because I wore black lipstick and had a deathmullet [in high school], I was the Cure's biggest fan. Which I was not.

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My Voice Nation Help

Sheldon:   Or you could, y'know, keep your cool and not fight with her, or at least not in front of the boy.  It takes 2 people to argue; if you don't play her game, both you and the boy win.  If you continue to fall prey to her ploys, or worse remove yourself from your son's life, both you and the boy lose, especially the boy.  And then you probably become the source of a lifetime's worth of problems for the boy.

It's really a no-brainer.

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