By Chris Lane
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Highlights from Hair Balls
Forget it — we're talking Aggies. Former Aggies. Former Aggies like quarterback Reggie McNeal, currently a Canadian Football League free agent. Currently a CFL free agent who keeps getting arrested for weed.
McNeal was arrested recently for marijuana possession in Bryan, thereby offering proof to our theory that you don't want to smoke dope with him. Here's why:
You will get arrested.
This marked the second time in just four months that McNeil has been arrested for marijuana. That is either some dumb bad luck or dumb bad behavior. For the second time in four months. That's UT Style, baby.
You will get arrested in the stupidest way.
Four months ago, it was a single joint in his car as he was pulled over on Highway 6. Say what you will about racial profiling, if you can't hide a single joint somewhere and act straight, you're probably too wasted to drive. On the other hand, maybe the cop was a Longhorn fan and decided to be thorough.
His second arrest came a week or so ago, and here's how the Bryan-College Station Eagle described it:
"According to the police report, Bryan officers were called to a home on Allen Ridge because of suspected drug activity after several vehicles were seen coming and going from the home.
"Officers reported that they could smell marijuana coming from inside the home. When they entered the house, loose marijuana and burnt marijuana cigars were in plain view, according to the police report."
"Several vehicles?" And how much weed are you smoking that they can smell it outside without noticing cops walking around?
The six top do-overs students wish they had once exam week hits.
Oh finals week, the time of year when students turn into zombies and energy drink companies make a killing. Some students aspire to do the bare minimum to squeeze out a C, some are going frantic trying to maintain their A. However, this is the week where all students kick themselves, asking themselves if they could've done more.
The answer is yes. Here's a list of the top six regrets students have come finals week.
It's funny how social media has consumed the lives of students. What's more important, paying attention in class or making sure your homegirl knows that the cookies she baked look soooooooo good? At the beginning of the year, it's the latter. Right now? Probably the former.
5. Writing illegible notes
You could be the best student in the world, always showing up to class, always asking the best questions, etc. But, when you're absorbing every word and transcribing it to your notebook as fast as you can, you may ask yourself when you're studying for finals, "What the fuck did I just write?"
It's a terrible feeling, like a punch to the stomach. All the hard work gone to waste because it looks like you wrote with your feet, blindfolded.
Get a laptop for next semester and print notes out, the first couple hundred pages are free on campus!
4. Skipping Class
Some students have a crazed psyche, thinking that if they miss one day, they've missed the most vital information, thus not missing a single class day. Others value sleep.
By the end of the year, students try to study everything on the syllabus in hopes of salvaging the time not spent in the classroom. Some get lucky, most beg their professors for extra credit. By that time, the professor automatically identifies you as the kid that shows up every once in awhile.
Next semester, don't be that kid.
3. Not buying the textbook
At the beginning of the year, students have this aura of confidence, thinking they don't need the textbook, they'll do fine without it. Plus, it's kinda expensive, so screw it.
When finals week lurks, and your Amazon Prime account has expired, you're going to hope you've got friends that want to share their books.
The book has a majority of the answers to your final, so buy it next time. Or, you can scour the Internet, hoping the answer to your question lies there. If it isn't there, buy a box of tissues and cry, because you could be screwed.
2. Not forming a study group
You know all the people around you when you sit down in the classroom? They're studying the same thing you are, so why not form a study group?
Once again, that aura of confidence described earlier could make a student believe that he or she doesn't need to form a study group, but there are way too many benefits in forming one. One, you've got study buddies. Two, you've got a contact just in case you miss a day. Three, you can have some dope adventures while studying.
We've all had that professor who doesn't care when you turn something in, as long as it's turned in before the last official day of classes. So, instead of actually doing the homework or essay, you waste a couple hours on YouTube finding the next big viral video (kapooyah, kapooyah!!!).
Then, the time you should be spending studying for your final, you're doing the work the professor gave you all semester to do and you ultimately bomb the exam.
Procrastination is like a drug to students; you just gotta do it. I mean, everyone else does! Don't be like everyone else. Be the one who creates change. Be the one who does the work on time!
Or, watching cat videos on YouTube is fine as well.