It's fall, and if you're anything like me, it means that the phrase "Can you get me coffee on the way back?" is getting uttered in your house a lot more. It's not coffee, though. Not JUST coffee. It's time for Pumpkin Spice Lattes, the McRib of overpriced caffeinated beverages. Starbucks's annual fall flavor sparks the sort of wild-eyed zeal usually seen only among Whovians and evangelicals with radio shows you can only seem to pick up while driving past cow pastures.
The PSL even made national news this year when the Food Babe claimed that it was basically 16 ounces of chemtrails and seemed confused over the difference between "pumpkin spice" and "pumpkin juice." Fans were appropriately whipped into a frothy frenzy to defend the drink, and somewhere along the line I'm sure the Food Babe got someone to spend $30 on 12 ounces of
magic beans chocolate.
People love the PSL, some so much so that simply drinking them is not enough. They need to celebrate with clothes and crafts, and thanks to Etsy, you can do just that.
Is your idea of decadence curling up with a hot drink in some warm slippers and reading Jane Austen all day? Well, that's sort of a lame sense of decadence from a species that invented vomitoriums and an $80 hot dog. Still, if that's what you like, then City Knitter of Toronto has you covered at a pretty reasonable price. These are PSL-inspired, hand-knitted slippers that will keep your toesies toasty and warm. Machine washable, too.
And for almost the same price as a pair of those knitted slippers Kristie Henley will send you a knitted sleeve to keep your PSL warm. It's like a hug for your drink. I'm not even sure I'm being sarcastic on that one.
I want to start off by saying this is an excellent fashion print by artist Katie Ryan, who is clearly talented and a deft hand with the colored pencils. That said, I'm not sure there's a better way to scream, "I wish my life were like Sex and the City" than owning this and openly displaying it in your home. It just feels like it should come with a poem about blackbirds or something.
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You know what? I'm not going to make fun of this one. I don't even drink coffee and I think the house smelling like PSL would be admittedly cozy as a coozie. Chicago Soap & Candle is offering handmade incense sticks that are strong enough to scent the house even without being lighted.
On the other hand, bathing in PSL soap seems a little...I don't know, ritualistic? It just feels like something Caligula would make a slave girl do before sacrificing her to Bona Dea (Side note: in researching Roman fertility gods, I found out there is a Roman god of door hinges.) Admittedly, the soap sounds like good stuff, made with molasses, ginger, cinnamon, allspice, nutmeg, ground cloves and pumpkin. At $5 it's cheaper than LUSH, that's for sure.
If knitted accessories aren't your thing, then maybe these PSL-inspired earrings made by Catherine Jeltes will do the trick. They are faceted crab fire agate gemstone beads, topped with Czech glass in ivory, that do indeed remind one of a PSL. Sadly, no one knits a coozie small enough to wrap around them.
Of course, part of the appeal of the PSL is that it is seasonal. Particularly in Texas, it's one of the signs that you can stop changing your shirt twice a day and petitioning to the governor that we rename the state Humidia. That's all well and shiny, but what if you want a latte most pumpkin spiced year 'round? Kimberly Hadlock has you covered. She makes lollipops that blend pumpkin spice syrup with coffee grounds, and sells them in packages of from six to 50. They ain't cheap, mind you, but neither is a $5 latte, so it's a little late in the game to be haggling.
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Finally, there's this bow tie from Tara Kills. All I'm going to say is that it is very clever, but PSL was not what I first thought of when I clicked on the picture.