Unfortunately, just about the only time we hear a Christian on TV talking about sex, it's in the context of denouncing "deviant" behavior. But contrary to these media images, Christians do have sex for reasons other than procreation, and they want to enjoy it just as much as anybody else. What's more, according to one pastor, the secret to passionate sex can be found right in the Bible.
Tommy Nelson's crusade to improve the sex lives of Christians began 12 years ago when a friend dared him to stand in front of his Denton Bible Church congregation and teach the explicit passages in the Song of Solomon, verses that many pastors would just as soon pretend never existed. Far from being offended by the frank talk, Nelson's flock was overwhelmingly positive about the sermon. So much so that Nelson created a Song of Solomon seminar on romance, love, marriage -- and great sex -- which will be stopping here in Houston.
"Most churches interpret [Song of Solomon] as allegory -- Solomon representing Jesus and the Shulamite as the church. But it's poetry, and this man, Solomon, wrote a very intimate passage about his true love. The scripture is very, very direct. It tells you how to make love inside marriage," says Doug Hudson, who coordinates the Song of Solomon conferences under his company, the Dallas-based Hudson Productions.
Nelson, a father and husband of 25 years, believes it's a misconception to say that God shuns sex and intimacy. Rather, God gave humans certain lusty desires, and in his kindly paternal manner, he gave them instructions on how and when to act on them.
"In an age of throwaway things, we get bored so easily and are always looking to replace something we've already got. These steps discuss the deepening of a marriage," Hudson says.
During the conference, Nelson examines Solomon's testament line by line, and interprets the sometimes "steamy" passages that run the gamut of the love spectrum: attraction and dating, courtship, intimacy, conflict, romance and commitment. Each of these phases is important in the progression of a successful relationship, Hudson says.
Lots of folks attend the workshop to discover what they've been doing wrong all these years. For Nelson, marriage is a key ingredient to a fulfilling romantic life, and contrary to reputation, it's not all man-on-top monotony once Christians have tied the knot. "[God] never gives you any boundaries on what's appropriate inside marriage," Hudson says. "But [the Bible] does specify that sex is reserved for marriage; then you can experiment and enjoy sex any way you want. Sex can bring enjoyment before marriage, but it will never bring what God intended it to be inside marriage."
So can you piece a marriage back together with a six-hour conference and a 100-page guide? Probably not, Hudson says. "But if you have an opportunity to hear that God has a plan for your romantic life, and he has tools in scripture on how to do it, then that may help."
