Lincoln! Batman! A Lot of Zombies!: The Most Anticipated Films of 2012
2012 promises to be a fun year to go to the movies, with the Christopher Nolan's Batman series closing out, The Avengers teaming up for the first time and Daniel Day-Lewis drinking the South's milkshake in Lincoln.
Of course 3-D pictures will continue to reign as long as asses are in the seats for them, but at least some studios aren't making new shitty movies in 3-D, and instead they are re-releasing older flicks in 3-D. That's one way to save cash. Films being released in 3-D this next year include Disney's Beauty and the Beast, Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, Titanic and Finding Nemo.
The February 13, 2012, release of The Phantom Menace is the opening salvo in George Lucas's quest to once again re-ruin your favorite Star Wars films. Expect each of them to get the 3-D treatment over the next few years.
And can I just say that we were all clamoring to see a naked Kate Winslet and the sinking of the Titanic in glorious 3-D?
Markiplier's You're Welcome Tour
TicketsThu., Jun. 8, 7:30pm
Something Rotten! (Touring)
TicketsFri., Jun. 9, 8:00pm
Something Rotten! (Touring)
TicketsSat., Jun. 10, 2:00pm
"The Fine Tex Mex Tour Starring William Lee Martin & Alex Reymundo"
TicketsFri., Jun. 16, 8:00pm
Disney Presents The Lion King (Touring)
TicketsTue., Jun. 27, 7:30pm
The Dark Knight Rises
Let's get this out of the way. This is the last Christopher Nolan-directed, Christian Bale-starring Batman film. The series will be rebooted after this one bows next summer. We are sad to see this team go, and fearful for the next round, but we will be more than consoled by Anne Hathaway as Catwoman on the big screen.
Words cannot adequately express how excited I am that Daniel Day-Lewis is playing Abraham Lincoln for Steven Spielberg. The picture that someone snapped of DDL at a restaurant on location a few weeks back gave me a nerd-on. He looks pissed!
The Hunger Games
"Set in a future where the Capitol selects a boy and girl from the twelve districts to fight to the death on live television..." I'm in.
Hugh Jackman as Jean Valjean. Russell Crowe as Inspector Javert. Anne Hathaway as Fantine, and Sacha Baron Cohen as Thénardier. This may just turn a new generation on to this classic work.
This one has been in development for freaking years. I remember when Arnold Schwarzenegger was attached, before he was even governor, or the father of an out-of-wedlock child. The sci-fi flick is about a Confederate soldier who gets whisked away to Mars, so it could also be a comedy.
Tim Burton remakes one of his first shorts using the amazing stop-motion animation that he made all his own with films like The Nightmare Before Christmas and Corpse Bride.
This is a throwback to those mega-cast comedies like Kentucky Fried Movie, which could hold a dozen smaller sketches inside the span of two hours. Movie 43 has a cast list featuring almost everyone funny in Hollywood. Even Richard Gere. Django Unchained
Leonardo DiCaprio is a slave owner who pits his slaves in death-duels for his own amusement on his plantation. Jamie Foxx's Django escapes, and slave enforcer Samuel L. Jackson goes running after him. It's QT, so it will be a must-see, and with Leo as an actual asshole will be fun to see. Plus, Don Johnson is somewhere in the cast.
This one could very well prove to be this decade's LA Confidential, with Nick Nolte, Ryan Gosling, Sean Penn and Josh Brolin teaming up in this upcoming film-noir centering on a fight between the LAPD and the Mafia post-World War II.
The Silver Linings Playbook
A tale about a teacher leaving a mental institution to live with his mother "starring Bradley Cooper" screams "mehhh!" but directed by David O. Russell and featuring Robert DeNiro sweetens the pot.
Interesting, director Oliver Stone takes on Mexican drug cartels with a cast headed by Uma Thurman and John Travolta. Can't wait to see how Stone connects the Mexican drug trade to the government. I mean, it's not like that has been in the news lately at all.
Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters
Because every one of your favorite historical or literary figures fought vampires, zombies and other ghouls.
The Great Gatsby
Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire, Carey Mulligan and Isla Fisher (above) take on the F. Scott Fitzgerald novel with the help of....Baz Luhrmann. Meet your friendly's new favorite movie. You will know the songs by heart by this time next year, against your better judgment.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3D
Wait, so no Rob Zombie anymore?? Next!
Rock Of Ages
We showed you this trailer this week on our Trailer Park blog. How many chances is Tom Cruise going to get to be likable again?
This Is Forty
It's a spin-off of Knocked Up with Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann. The Apatow generation begins to look at aging.
Snow White & the Huntsman and/or Mirror, Mirror
Take your pick. Do you want Kristen Stewart as a sword-wielding Snow, or Julia Roberts as just goddamned annoying? Not even my man-crush on Armie Hammer will make me see Mirror, Mirror.
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn; Part 2
All your favorites team up, Captain America, Thor, Toothless Joe, Iron Man, The Black Widow, The Hulk, not Batman, oh, just watch the trailer again.
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
All your favorites are back in Peter Jackson's second go-around with the Tolkien saga. Look for this one next Christmas season.
The Amazing Spider-Man
No one is looking forward to seeing Battleship.
Oh! Just in time to stoke the fires of the Obamanism sweeping the country, huh Fox News?
Kill Bin Laden
With Tom Hardy, Rooney Mara and Guy Pearce, dramatizing the run-up to the killing of the titular terrorist leader. But who will play Bin Laden?
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Of course Lincoln had to fight vampires. Of course.
Your next James Bond feature is currently in production with Daniel Craig, who is easily the most icy and sturdy 007 in the series. Even money on the villain being another Eastern bloc leftover.
Michael Fassbender, Charlize Theron and Patrick Wilson star in Ridley Scott's anticipated space picture about the origins of mankind, with guns!
The Bourne Legacy
Jeremy Renner replaces the old Bourne, Matt Damon, who leaves the spy game to buy a zoo.
I will not accept this film, unless Kate Upton is in it with three boobs. Check out the Comic Con 2011 panel for the film, with the stars on board. Also starring Bryan Cranston, as the first meth dealer in space.
"This one time, in lamaze class..." What? Too gross?
World War Z
Zombies and Brad Pitt with a goatee. Start lining up now, I guess.
Bullet To The Head
It's Sly Stallone's seventh gritty comeback. The eighth will be August's The Expendables 2.
Men In Black III
This trailer dropped just this week as well. Can you believe this series began nearly 15 years ago? When Will Smith wasn't even a Scientologist?
John Cusack playing Edgar Allan Poe. Quick! Top 5 songs about Edgar Allan Poe!
Most people in this film's target audience have never seen the original gothic soap opera, save for maybe YouTube clips, but the success of The Muppets this past month may bode well for the Johnny Depp vehicle, banking on older source material. With Tim Burton directing, it's almost a lock to be a hit.
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