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Pop Rocks: Feminine Products Have Amazing Commercials

It's not very often that I receive e-mails from my mother-in-law with the subject line "Best Tampon Commercial Ever," so naturally I needed to drop everything I was doing and immediately watch. Within an hour, the Hello Flo commercial was trending, half of my Facebook friends had reposted it (guys and gals) and it was making headlines. It's a commercial about periods and it's funny!

If you haven't watched it yet, (see below) the ad features a young camper and her rise and fall as her summer camp's tampon Nazi. She becomes the big boss of her sleep away by hoarding and distributing ladies' monthly necessities; until one day her reign of power comes to an abrupt end due to Hello Flo. Hello Flo is like a Birchbox for your monthly shame, and if you don't know what Birchbox is, that's because you are not a girl and this product is not targeted toward you anyway.

I love this commercial. It's a little girl talking about periods, which is already a rarity, but she talks about them in the most candid way. She uses the word "vag" multiple times. It got me wishing for more tongue-and-cheek ad campaigns for feminine products. Why should we pretend that what goes on down there isn't sort of hilarious in a miserable way? Because it really is. And we all go through it, so why not celebrate it with a good laugh? Seriously, sometimes it is so miserable that if we don't poke fun, we'll kill ourselves or you, Mister. Actually we'd rather kill you; now go get us those chips and put on Basketball Wives and go the 'eff away (they are stereotypes because they are true).

I dug around and was pleasantly surprised to find that other lady-centric companies also have a sense of humor and some of it is really disgusting. I hope this Hello Flo ad starts a new trend in tampon commercials, but for now here are 10 that I found to be pretty great.

Tampax

In light of the recent

Sharknado

craze, I would rerelease this commercial. The gist of it is that sharks smell blood and without Tampax you are leaking all over the place, hence you will probably be eaten by a shark. It's pretty revolting if you think about it for more than a minute.

Bodyform

A few years ago this guy Richard Neill angrily posted on Facebook that he was upset that he and all other men had been lied to for years by happy-go-lucky maxipad advertisements featuring women with huge smiles, just absolutely overjoyed with the fact that each month they are lucky enough to get a visit from Aunt Flo. Neill called BS on the industry as a whole and got 80,000 Facebook likes.

Taking advantage of this viral post, Bodyform, a British company, addressed the misconception in an amazing commercial. The head of Bodyform (played by an actress) apologizes for misleading men for all of these years into thinking that women actually enjoy their period, when in reality it is a the most horrific time of the month. It's all very sarcastic and witty; any guy who's ever dated a woman for more than four weeks knows that the time of the month is when they should go into hiding.

"I think it's time we came clean," says the CEO of Bodyform in the ad. "We lied to you, Richard, and I want to say sorry. ... Sorry."

Milk PMS

Apparently, milk helps ease PMS. I had no idea and I think I may be better off knowing that. Do you think almond milk works the same way though?

 Massengill

I love this commercial. It's so strange and creepy. It's always pleasant to see mothers and daughters who are close enough to discuss their douching habits, but why are they walking on the beach together arm in arm as if they are going to start kissing at any moment? The brilliance of this ad is how utterly unbelievable it is. Ladies (or gentlemen, I won't ostracize), have you ever asked your mom if she douches? As a teenage girl, the last thing you want to do is have that conversation with your mother. Rather than asking, this commercial would be way more realistic if the teenage daughter did what we all did when we were in our adolescent years and we were completely embarrassed by our own bodies and sneak into our mother's medicine cabinet, find her feminine products and bring them to school and ask one of our girlfriends in the bathroom at lunch what the hell the thing is and what to do with it. Or being that it's 2013, just Google it.

Whisper

I think we can all agree that Japanese people have some bizarre trends, but after watching this Whisper commercial, I am convinced that the entire country is eating LSD. What is going on in this commercial? Do you become an animated avatar in the future when you use Whisper maxipads? Do you plug them into some vagina mainframe? Is it like

Tron

on its period? When you use Whisper maxipads you are sucked into a digital world where you need infrared vision to see blood. Aren't maxipads way too 21st century for all that jazz?

Mooncups

There is a British rap battle in a bathroom that is debating tampons versus menstrual cups. And from the looks of it, the menstrual cups won. How do you argue with that logic? What woman out there doesn't choose her feminine products based on which have more skills in a rap-off?

On a side note, I am going to be real upfront with you all, I know nothing of these menstrual cups and I want nothing to do with them whether they can drop a dope rhyme or not.

Saba Maxipad

Murders, you are in luck! Whether you need a pad to suck up your heavy flow or to conveniently clean up blood from off of the floor, the Saba maxipad can do it all.

Libra Tampons

Sending your significant other to get tampons for you is cruel and unusual punishment, but this commercial proves even more so that men should not be buying feminine products. Why would he want them in a larger size? Does his girl have a significantly large lady-part? They are not like condoms bro; you don't buy larger ones to boost your self esteem.

 Kotex

This ad may not honestly have had a hidden camera tracking this guy asking very logical questions about tampons, but it is effective and enjoyable nonetheless. What's ironic is that it seems like half the women have no idea what a tampon is either. I would love to run into this guy asking about which tampon to buy for his girl; I would direct him right to the old women diaper section. Oh, like you've never wanted to try and wear one during your monthly visit? Oh, you haven't.

Mooncup

Another advertisement for Mooncup, except this is an entire song comprised of the different words used in place of the word vagina. My recent favorite is "tweeter." Where in the world did that come from? When your hoo-ha tweets, is it less than 140 characters?


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