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Razzies Trash Jennifer Aniston and Various Vampires

Sure the Oscars celebrated Natalie Portman, the Coen Brothers, and Banksy earlier this week with their predictable noms, but the real fun fatty meat is with the Golden Raspberry Awards or Razzies. The Razzies have been skewering the worst in film since 1981, which makes 30 years of hating on shitty movies. And brother, it'll continue as long as Hollywood is greenlighting movies about talking babies that are geniuses and Jennifer Aniston is breathing.

Seriously, can she not make a decent movie anymore? Remember The Good Girl with Jake Gyllenhaal? It wasn't great, but it was a change. I even sort of liked The Break-Up, and not for the ass-shot. But it seems like every movie she comes out with is a boring couple date flick that gathers dust on your DVD shelf next to the Strip Aerobics box-set.

The first Worst Picture winner was 1980's Can't Stop The Music, the movie with the Village People and Bruce Jenner, directed by Allan Carr. In fact, the founder of the awards, John J.B. Wilson, actually started the Razzies after watching both Music and Xanadu in a row with friends.

Neil Diamond was voted as Worst Actor for his film The Jazz Singer, and The Blue Lagoon's Brooke Shields was rewarded with the first Worst Actress prize.

The actors and actresses with the most Razzies since 1980 have been Sylvester Stallone (natch), Sharon Stone, and Madonna, who has won five awards, including one for Body Of Evidence, which rules when you're a pre-teen with cable in your room.

This year's pool of wasted talent is stellar with Aniston and Ashton Kutcher the big nominees. That assclown George Lopez snagged a Worst Supporting Actor nom for not one but three movies. Upside-Down Exclamation Point Que lastima! Also, them Twilight boys got all sorts of bloodied. I feel so sorry for hot dudes with millions of dollars. Don't mind me, this tub of cottage cheese doesn't either.

Here's your Razzie Class Of 2011. May God help all of you with any of these movies on your shelves at home.


WORST PICTURE

Vampires Suck

Twilight: Eclipse

The Bounty Hunter

The Last Airbender

MY PICK: Sex & The City 2

WORST ACTOR

MY PICK: Jack Black Gulliver's Travels

Gerard Butler The Bounty Hunter

Ashton Kutcher Killers & Valentine's Day

Taylor Lautner Twlight: Eclipse & Valentine's Day

Robert Pattinson Remember Me & Twilight: Eclipse

 

WORST ACTRESS

Miley Cyrus The Last Song

Jennifer Aniston The Bounty Hunter & The Switch

Kim Cattrall, Kristin Davis, Cynthia Nixon and Sarah Jessica Parker Sex & The City 2

MY PICK: Megan Fox Jonah Hex

Kristen Stewart The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR

Billy Ray Cyrus The Spy Next Door

Dev Patel The Last Airbender

Jackson Rathbone The Last Airbender & The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

MY PICK: Rob Schneider Grown-Ups

George Lopez Marmaduke, The Spy Next Door, Valentine's Day

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

MY PICK: Jessica Alba The Killer Inside Me, Little Fockers, Machete, Valentine's Day

Cher Burlesque

Liza Minelli Sex & The City 2

Nicola Peltz The Last Airbender

Barbara Streisand Little Fockers

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