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Film and TV

The Rock is All Man in the New Trailer for Hercules

Sometimes someone shows you an idea on paper. You look at it, scratch your goatee, and you think that the idea is ludicrous. Still, to be polite, you smile and say, "We'll see how that turns out."

Time passes, and now this someone shows you the same idea as a picture. Again you look at it, again you scratch your goatee, and again you think that the idea is ludicrous. Again, to be polite, you smile and say, "We'll see how that turns out."

More time passes and now that person is back, again, only this time they have video. And they make you watch it.

Look. Scratch. Think. Ludicrous. Smile.

What I'm saying is that I'm not entirely sold on this new Hercules movie.

Understand that I'm not saying that it looks bad. Yeah, that CGI is a little too cartoony for my liking, but I'm hoping it'll look better on the big screen. I'm not saying that Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson looks bad either; it's a different look, to be sure, but he looks suitably muscley. He could probably use a haircut though; he's not Sampson.

I do think the tone is weird. I know trailers are supposed to make you want to see more of the flick, but I'm not sure this trailer does enough to make me want to see this particular film. Like, would it be bad to have a light-hearted but also bad ass move about Hercules? I'm also not sure how I'm supposed to reconcile the idea that Hercules is a man when he walks around wearing a lion; you're already more than a man at that point, I think.

I want this movie to be good. As a professional wrestling dork, I'm inclined to believe The Rock is the third greatest man that ever lived behind Steve Austin and Ric Flair. As a Greek mythology dork, I want to see the more fantastic elements of his story on screen. I watched enough of Hercules: The Legendary Journeys growing up that I think I'm owed that much.

But still, right now at least, I'm still scratching my goatee. We'll see how it turns out, I guess.

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Cory Garcia is a Contributing Editor for the Houston Press. He once won an award for his writing, but he doesn't like to brag about it. If you're reading this sentence, odds are good it's because he wrote a concert review you don't like or he wanted to talk pro wrestling.
Contact: Cory Garcia