Well, Colorado is quickly becoming the coolest of the 50 states. Sorry, New York and California! You can no longer toot your own overinflated horns, because Colorado wins the entire Internet now that they're legalizing recreational pot shops.
Yep, you read that right. Colorado, our white-water-loving, snowboard-obsessed neighbor to the West, is legalizing recreational pot shops as of January 1. We're impressed with their gusto, and the fact that they're sweeping in this blanket legalization of weed makes this the best New Year's resolution a state has ever made.
Oh, and don't get yourself all twisted into an anti-reefer "think of the children" tizzy just yet, conservatives. Colorado is not passing a pot free-for-all. Under the new guidelines, cannabis will be available for purchase in amounts of up to an ounce, and only by adults ages 21 or older.
You can also, under the new guidelines, purchase seeds to grow your own pot patch. Up to six plants are allowed, but they've gotta be enclosed and locked away. That part is for your own good, really. Neighbors in Colorado will come borrowing a "cup of sugar" way more often if they know where your stash is.
There's no pot smoking in public areas or in rec shops, so no one needs to worry about the dreaded hot-boxing of your local Wahoo's or anything, either. Your public areas are safe. Folks will toke away in the comfort of their own homes, presumably while watching Spongebob Squarepants like normal people.
Those smarty pants in Colorado are also using this manna-pot from heaven to be fiscally responsible; they're taxing the pot being sold for recreational use -- but that tax won't affect the users of medical marijuana -- and you'll have to have a Colorado ID in order to purchase an ounce. You can, however, purchase up to a quarter of an ounce if you're from out of state. You can also be a good pothead and share with your friends, so it's all good on that end.
We like where this whole thing is headed. Leaving citizens of your fine state to get high on their own supply -- purchased legally from a store where it's regulated and taxed -- is a mighty fine idea, Colorado. We kind of wish other, more panhandled states would take note. Washington already has; they're opening their first retail pot outlets in 2014, but Colorado beat them to it.
So in honor of our friendly recreational pot states, Colorado and Washington, we've put together a list of the top 10 cannabis gadgets to use when you're sampling the goods. And don't worry, Texas. We only know these things exist because of research. Nothing more.
Worst thing ever? When you can't find your lighter to blaze up, man. This little contraption solves the problem by combining the two. Just designate a spot to leave it before you test it out, or you run the risk of misplacing the entire thing. Perhaps someone can update it with a Clapper or something.
Check it out. This little contraption is self-standing, and it aerates and cools the smoke simultaneously, which means you won't choke on it, you big wuss. There are air intake holes along the sides to help keep the pipe clean, cause we all know how gross they can get otherwise. Well, not this little thing. It'll stay super clean. And it's so cool looking! And it's made in Texas!
See, we're right there with ya, Colorado. We craft these cool ass pipes that are available for tobacco smoking here in Texas, but you can use them for whatever you like in states where that's legal to do. Wink, wink.
These vaporizers are so cool looking, with that retro-meets-robot-modern design, and since you're vaping and not burning your supply, you can say -- with a straight face -- that you don't smoke marijuana. Technically, with the help of this thing, you inhale. The vape heats the cannabis up to 374 degrees, creating a vapor that you inhale rather than smoke. It runs on butane, which is easily refillable, and it kind of looks like an old school radio. So yeah, it's pretty rad.
The Budbat is another one of those pipes that's just kind of awesome overall. From the makers of the "Budbomb," the Budbat looks like a little silver baseball bat, and it's even cooler because the only thing you're hitting with it is your weed, and you get to store extra bud in it just in case. Oh, and the bud compartment, which is aptly named the "dugout," can be sealed, and the holes that surround the dugout make for an even burn through and through. Even if you hate baseball, this thing is teh awesome.
These are so freakin' cool. Even if you aren't a smoker, how could you not be fascinated by the insane detail on this mad science water pipe? Austin-based artist Steven Peirce teamed up with the folks at 420science.com to create this whole line, and they're just so rad. They aerate and cool, so you choke less, and there's a 4 oz jar built in to every pipe to store your stash. We're putting this out on our coffee table like the piece of art it is.
This pipe is as much of a conversation piece as it is a device in which you imbibe on your legally-procured goods. It looks just like every terrible sci-fi UFO you've ever seen, which means it's kitschy and proper stoner material. You really can't go wrong with it. (Plus it works somethin' fierce. Just sayin'.)
This pipe starts out completely flat, fits in the credit card slot of your wallet, and folds right into a pipe when the need arises. It's basically the perfect thing to put in your wallet. It's all medical-grade stainless steel, too, so you can't really go wrong with it. Where you can go is oh-so-right.
This thing is insane. The Defstar Bubbler, which may have the coolest name ever, is handmade with laboratory-grade borosilicate glass, and is the product of some wicked weed genius in Denver, Colorado. (We told you Colorado was awesome.) The smooth chamber makes for some even, smooth hits, and it's super easy to clean once you tear your sticky-icky mitts away from it. It's kind of too wicked-looking to put down, we think.
Does this thing even look like it belongs on Earth? It's beyond crazy. When you order this massive smoking gadget, you get exactly what you're expecting from something so insanely detailed. The Vapor Bubbler is handmade for you when you order it out of borosilicate glass, so you get a one-of-a-kind piece to call your own. The artist is from Oregon, another pro-pot state, and the fruit of their weed labors is beyond awesome. We want one, bad.
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The Volcano Vaporizer is the king of all smoking devices, vapor or otherwise. The vaporizer uses a unique balloon technology instead of glass, which fills up with vapor -- not smoke -- in about 30 seconds flat, and at a temperature you decide upon and input into the digital base. How freaking cool is that?! It cuts down on toxins and tar, and the flavor you'll get from the vapors is nothing close to that whole insta-pipe from a soda can you used to use in high school.
The Volcano Vaporizer is the grown-up version of paraphernalia. And the best thing about that? It's totally legal to have your weed chillin' in it Colorado as of January 1. We are admittedly jealous over here in the Lone Star state.