ZZ Top-Inspired Ski Gear

Kids and facial hair. Second only to household pets and wigs on the scale of oddly adorable.
Kids and facial hair. Second only to household pets and wigs on the scale of oddly adorable.
Smosh.com

The ski mask (or balaclava) is in desperate need of an image overhaul. Thanks to Hollywood--and countless hours of surveillance footage--what was once just a functional item of clothing is now commonly associated with art thieves, terrorists, and kidnappers.

And then came the knit beard. Now, even the follically-challenged can enjoy a warm, toasty face without being mistaken for a deadly assassin.

Somehow the artist manages to make "The Grandpa Edition" look menacing.
Somehow the artist manages to make "The Grandpa Edition" look menacing.
beardhead.com

BeardHead Artist: N/A (Los Angeles, CA) Products: Adult Knit Beards Price: ON SALE NOW! $29.99 Quote: "There are two types of men in this world. The bearded ones and the unbearded ones."

The industry leader in faux facial hair knit products. Bear Head knit caps--available in Viking, Lumberjack, Pirate, Grandpa, Bunny (for the ladies)--can also be customized with a variety of mustaches. Nothing says sexy on the slopes like a "Fu Manchu Bunny".

Feeling blue? There's a beard for that (In Royal or Navy).
Feeling blue? There's a beard for that (In Royal or Navy).

Upcoming Events

Foamy Wader Artist: Alexa (Seattle, WA) Products: Handmade gemstone earrings, bracelets, necklaces--and knit beards. Price: $10.00 - $198.00 (Beards from $35-$75) Quote: "Great gift for the man who has everything or for the lady who complains of a cold face. Great for keeping those militant bike riders warm too!"

A real multitasker! This lengthy variation can be wrapped around your neck as a scarf or tucked in as a dickey. Available in a variety of styles including elf, gnome, pirate, Treebeard, and wizard.

Artist Erin Dollar models "The Ex Talk Show Host." "Complete with all the charm of a certain red-headed talk show host, without the scent of tears cried over broken dreams."
Artist Erin Dollar models "The Ex Talk Show Host." "Complete with all the charm of a certain red-headed talk show host, without the scent of tears cried over broken dreams."

I Made You A Beard Artist: Erin Dollar (Los Angeles, CA) Products: Knit Beards for adults and kids; beard-related art Price: $12.00 - $45.00 Quote: "I am a Portland native, where there are only two types of people: hipsters with beards, and lumberjacks with beards."

Artist Erin Dollar didn't let a silly thing like biology stand between the thick, luxurious beard she'd always dreamed of growing. And she made you one too.


Sponsor Content

Newsletters

All-access pass to the top stories, events and offers around town.

  • Top Stories
    Send:

Newsletters

All-access pass to top stories, events and offers around town.

Sign Up >

No Thanks!

Remind Me Later >