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2010 Stories by Jef With One F

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  • Which Other Musicians Should Start Tea Parties?

    published Dec 02, 2010

    The continued persecution of Nelson, Willie for the smoking of weed in the name of being a laid-back national treasure has spawned the Teapot Party. Get it? Rocks Off got to wondering who else will h... More >>

  • Will Silence Be This Year's UK Christmas No. 1?

    Will Silence Be This Year's UK Christmas No. 1?

    published Dec 01, 2010

    In the United Kingdom, singles that are No. 1 on the UK Singles Chart the week before Christmas are for some reason called Christmas No. 1s - we can't imagine why. It's something of an honor to our fr... More >>

  • Witchy Woman

    published December 2, 2010

    La Catrin walked down the stairs at Etro, strobe lights and the refraction of a Hammer horror film her only spotlight. Nonetheless, all eyes... More >>

  • What Does Batman Have To Do With "Jingle Bells"?

    published Nov 30, 2010

    Jingle Bells! Batman smells Robin laid an egg. Batmobile lost a wheel And the Joker got away. Everyone has heard this parody of "Jingle Bells." In fact, for a couple of years Rocks off had recit... More >>

  • Puccini And The Radioactive Death Of Opera

    published Nov 29, 2010

    People who know nothing about opera know one of two names. The first is Wagner, whom most of us are familiar with because Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd danced around singing "Kill the Wabbit" to the tune ... More >>

  • YouTube Reinstates Ally ASL's Account

    YouTube Reinstates Ally ASL's Account

    published Nov 26, 2010

    Allyson Townsend, better known to her fans as Ally ASL, made headlines earlier this month when YouTube shut down her account after Universal Music Group and Warner Music Group complained that her vide... More >>

  • Nitzer Ebb, Part 2: "Faith Healers"

    published Nov 25, 2010

    Wednesday, Rocks Off spoke with Nitzer Ebb about their return to Houston, once a city internationally known for its growing electronica scene and rabid EBM fans. Since the band's reunion earlier this... More >>

  • Five Musicians Who Would Make Kick-Ass Parade Balloons

    published Nov 25, 2010

    Rocks Off does not go to actual parades because we'll be damned if we'll waste clean pants on something that doesn't involve booze or Harry Potter, but we always make sure to catch the Macy's Thanksgi... More >>

  • Nitzer Ebb: We Push Quite Hard

    Nitzer Ebb: "We Push Quite Hard"

    published Nov 24, 2010

    Nitzer Ebb's influence on electronic music can't be overstated, and when the band broke up in the mid-90s, their enormous back catalog became staples for DJs all across the world. When they reunited ... More >>

  • "Straight Outta Hogwarts": The Birth Of Wizard Rap

    published Nov 24, 2010

    The beginning of the end is here, as Rocks Off and approximately 1.21 gazillion fans flock to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1 to see the end of the saga. Many things have sprung up in the... More >>

  • How Gangrene Led To The Conductors' Baton

    published Nov 23, 2010

    Conductors and wizards have a lot in common. Both are usually older men, are greatly respected and feared and, most importantly, both use wands to work their magic. But just as the wands of the Harry ... More >>

  • Staffing The Ultimate Evil Record Label

    Staffing The Ultimate Evil Record Label

    published Nov 22, 2010

    "The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side." - Attributed to Hunter ... More >>

  • The Alphabet Song: Not Enough Swearing

    The Alphabet Song: Not Enough Swearing

    published Nov 19, 2010

    Fatawesome is a band of incredible bastards who know how to make you laugh and bang your head at the same time. Last time we checked in with them, they had laid down a rap tribute to the Oregon Trail ... More >>

  • Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame: Puppet Wing

    Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame: Puppet Wing

    published Nov 18, 2010

    Ladies and gentlemen, Rocks Off is pleased as rum punch to announce that The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has (not) added an official puppet wing to that fine institution. What's even better, they have ... More >>

  • YouTube Shuts Down Ally ASL For Copyright Infringement

    YouTube Shuts Down Ally ASL For Copyright Infringement

    published Nov 17, 2010

    Allyson Townsend, who built herself a fervent fanbase by translating modern pop songs by Miley Cyrus, Kesha, and others into American Sign Language, has been shut down by YouTube in the name of copyri... More >>

  • Keyboardist Seeks Arabic Players To Explore Local Scene

    Keyboardist Seeks Arabic Players To Explore Local Scene

    published Nov 16, 2010

    Rocks Off combs through Craigslist's postings hoping to find the genesis of some great musical endeavor. So when we saw a posting looking for Arabic singers, we were intrigued. After all, this is a t... More >>

  • The Lyrical Crimes Of Nickelback's Chad Kroeger

    published Nov 15, 2010

    Today is Chad Kroeger of Nickleback's birthday. Huzzah. For years, Nickelback has been like those Nigerian bank scams; Dangerous, annoying and, frankly, not something anyone can do just a whole lot a... More >>

  • Castle Lights' <em>Paint the Stars</em> Outshines The Sky

    Castle Lights' Paint the Stars Outshines The Sky

    published Nov 12, 2010

    Almost the first story that Rocks Off did here was music that had its inception at Red Tree Recording Studio. Since then, the studio has sent us solid gold album after solid gold album, and their late... More >>

  • A Survivor's Guide To Death By Vomit

    published Nov 11, 2010

    Your humble narrator went to our day job on Saturday like we always do. We stopped at Sonic on the way and got a bacon sandwich like we always do. Then we spent the rest of the weekend praying to ever... More >>

  • 30 Seconds With Bob Schneider

    published Nov 10, 2010

    Rocks Off sat down with Bob Schneider to see what we could learn about the popular Austin singer-songwriter in 30 seconds. Rocks Off: What is the worst song in the world? Bob Schneider: Obviously th... More >>

  • Why Do Bandmates Want To Kill Each Other?

    published Nov 09, 2010

    A band is the family you choose. We can't speak for your family, but in our family we send you to the hospital over the last piece of chicken. We've seen our cousins choked unconscious more often than... More >>

  • Tear Me Down: Five Songs About The Berlin Wall

    published Nov 09, 2010

    Today is World Freedom Day! The holiday was declared in 2001 by George W. Bush to celebrate the fall of the Berlin Wall and just how awesome he felt Ronald Reagan was. It was 21 years ago today that E... More >>

  • Kemo For Emo Breaks In Half, Seeks New Members

    Kemo For Emo Breaks In Half, Seeks New Members

    published Nov 08, 2010

    It seemed like it was a good year to be a member of Kemo for Emo. The quartet narrowly lost to Skeleton Dick for best punk band in the 2010 Houston Press Music Awards - making it their fourth nominat... More >>

  • Cage Match: Justin Bieber Vs. Muhammidali

    published Nov 05, 2010

    Ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow night a battle will be waged for souls of Houston music fans. The stages have been set. The combatants are ready. In this corner, weighing approximately 9 lbs and sporti... More >>

  • The Future of Movies! The Store

    The Future of Movies! The Store

    published Nov 04, 2010

    There might be people in Houston who are greater movie fans than Rob Arcos, but if there are, there can't be many. Art Attack has known Arcos almost a decade. We slung popcorn and sacrificed blood to... More >>

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