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1996 Stories by Randall Patterson

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  • First Baptist Church expected 50,000 people to see this year's Christmas spectacular. The stage was ready. The wise men and the shepherds had been cast. Now, all they needed was...THE NEW JESUS

    published December 19, 1996

    In the beginning was the script, and the script was with God, and the script was God, and the people auditioned for the roles. A hospital clerk... More >>

  • Holy Warrior

    published November 7, 1996

    The morning always began with a prayer and always proceeded with gospel music. It would have been easy to believe this was Sunday service, if the... More >>

  • Entry Level Movie

    published October 10, 1996

    When he was 25 years old, Rick Harrington wrote a novel about a time when women have taken over the Earth. No one wanted the book, and so he... More >>

  • Crimes of Hygiene

    published September 12, 1996

    As cabdrivers go, Alice Fountain thought she looked pretty sharp that day in June. She was wearing silk, with stockings and heels, and she was... More >>

  • Beastly Behavior

    published August 22, 1996

    Info:Correction Date: August 29, 1996 Beastly Behavior Wildlife rehabilitator Vivian Steele got along fine with animals. It's people who... More >>

  • Lovely Latin Ladies

    published August 1, 1996

    When the mail came, Bruce and James divided the world. James took the international post to one room, and Bruce, the domestic to another. One... More >>

  • Old and Rare

    published June 13, 1996

    The last time that Colleen Urbanek forgot where she was, she was walking across her parking lot, on the way to the mailbox. The sun was bright and... More >>

  • Space Case

    published May 30, 1996

    The sky turned green a few months back, from Dallas all the way to the Gulf. "A lot of people saw it," the man was saying, and if you didn't, you... More >>

  • Darko's Game

    published May 9, 1996

    Darko Rop is tall and thin and amiable, and he looks about as imposing as a grown-up Opie Taylor. This is your basic world-class Ping-Pong... More >>

  • Fourth and Long

    published April 11, 1996

    The offensive line was composed chiefly of cooks. On Saturday, they had allowed the quarterback to suffer so greatly that on Monday, he came to... More >>

  • Escargot A Go-Go

    published February 29, 1996

    They say Gene Weaver could sell you the hair on your head. He says he's already done that. He's sold Taiwanese wigs, peddled cashew trees in... More >>

  • Rim Shots

    published February 29, 1996

    The monthly meetings of the Bellaire Parks and Recreation Advisory Board are not known for their controversies. Normally, they proceed with the... More >>

  • He Spanked an American Hero

    published January 18, 1996

    The candidate was very clear on at least one position, and that was his position on location. He certainly knew where he was. What you do... More >>

  • The Last Battle of Chau Minh Nguyen

    published January 4, 1996

    When a customer walked into his store and pulled out a gun, Chau Minh Nguyen was playing with his children. That was the first time... More >>

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