It's not the bouncy organ music or seven seconds of a metal-pop tune that calls Houston Astros fans to order at Minute Maid Park. No, it's the booming pipes of Bob Ford, who, as he checks names off the starting lineup, sounds as if he's listing horsepower and torque stats on a Chevy truck commercial. In the lull of a regular-season contest (and there are several), Ford picks up the pace with his overly dramatic intonations, such as "No. 14: Morgan Ehhhnsberg!" Or he'll make a player's name sound like an action verb: "And now, JasonLane!" And the dude has an excellent command of syllables, as evidenced by his syncopated "Ad-am-Ever-uuuuhhhtt!" If this guy ever said "Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!" during a game, we'd be in heaven.