Chan Ho(me Run) Park

The folks at Glamour Shots sure can work wonders.

Okay, I know that desperate times supposedly call for desperate measures, but

Chan Ho Park

? I don’t think that a degree of desperation exists which justifies the Astros signing Chan Ho Park to a contract, even if it is a minor league contract.

What, was Jose Lima not available? And geeze, Drayton, if you want to appeal to the Asian fans, then why not try for Hideo Nomo – at least he used to be a good pitcher. Or why not go after Ichiro Suzuki in the off-season since the guy’s going to be a free agent?

I love the quote, from the Associated Press story, that the Astros signed Park “hoping the 13-year veteran can boost their mediocre pitching staff.” The Astros pitching staff is mediocre. But it’s nowhere near Chan Ho(me Run) Park mediocre.

Park started out the season with the Mets. And the Mets pitching staff was beat up by injuries, and Shea Stadium is what is known as a pitcher’s ballpark, and not even the Mets wanted him. He spent last season in San Diego, pitching in another so-called pitcher’s park, and his stats were mediocre – just like Woody Williams. And he really wasn’t very good in that home run haven up in Arlington. So just what is it that makes the Astros think that he can get the job done here?

And I really like this quote: “You never have enough pitching,” Garner said. “This guy, he's had a history. If he turns out to be OK, maybe there's a possibility for us”

Yeah, I say he’s got a history. A bad history. But Garner’s right about never having enough pitching. Especially the Astros. This team definitely doesn’t have enough pitching. Enough good pitching. It’s got plenty of bad pitching.

Just bite that bullet Drayton and put in the call. Call Jose Lima. Bring him back. I’m sure that Casa Ole would agree to pick up some of his salary if he’d go back to doing its commercials.

And really, if you’re going to go mediocre, let’s go Jose Lima. There’s still enough time left in the season for him to break the National League record for the number of home runs surrendered in a season by a pitcher. That home run record clock can take the place of that Biggio countdown clock in the outfield. And Drayton can even save some money: Since Lima already owns the record, he won’t have to go to any extra effort to fly in the record holder, he’ll already be on the mound.

It’s Lima time. Again.

Come on people. Say it with me: WE WANT JOSE! WE WANT JOSE! -- John Royal

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