Lotsa Zeroes for O

Party at Roy's house!

It can never be good news when the Astros send a non-game-related press release at 11:29 p.m. But lo — last night, the news was indeed good.

Your Houston Astros have inked slinger Roy Oswalt to five-year, $73 million contract extension, which runs through the 2011 season. Hells yeah. Have to admit, it didn't look good when his name was dubiously dangled in swap talks just before the MLB trade deadline. Seemed a perfect scenario for the Astros to go all Nolan Ryan on us.

But instead, the 'Stros gave Roy O a pretty dang nice birthday present (he turned 29 yesterday).

Given Oswalt's love for bulldozers, we did a little research. If he uses his money wisely and goes used, he could buy a whole bunch of Caterpillar D6N Xls — just like the kind that Drayton McLane bought him.

Well, 386, to be exact. Man, someone at John Deere's gonna have a helluva commission check. — Steven Devadanam

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