Rockets Acquire Forward Artest in Deal

Yes! A reason to be excited about Houston Rockets basketball.

For those not in the know, last night the Rockets acquired multi-talented Sacramento Kings forward, rapper and noted animal lover Ron Artest. Artest is one of those hard-asses who will bang away under the hoop, has a decent shot and likes to play defense. He’s also the kind of guy who, from what I understand, will let his coaches and teammates know when he’s not happy with how things are going with the team.

And of course, you rich bastards who sit down on the court might like this deal as Artest is known for coming into the seats to play around with his fans. Of course, this is the Rockets, so most of the fans who are getting drunk are either in the upper deck or are in the lower deck and don’t believe in going to their seats, so the newest Rocket might have to explore things for a bit in order to find someone to play with.

But seriously, I like this trade. Artest brings some much-needed attitude to the Rockets. I’ve just got to ask, though: What’s it going to take to get a real point guard for this team? -- John Royal

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