You. Can't. Be. Serious.

I can’t help but notice that one of the newest Rockets, Justin Reed, was arrested for possession of marijuana. And I can’t help but wonder if he just happened to be over by the offices of the Houston Astros, because that’s the only explanation I can arrive at for why the Astros are interviewing Muzzy Jackson, the former assistant General Manager of the Kansas City Royals, to become the Astros’ general manager.

THE. KANSAS. CITY. ROYALS.

The Kansas City Royals, one of the worst teams in baseball since way back in the early-90s. A team that once had Jermaine Dye, Carlos Beltran, and Johnny Damon in the same outfield and still couldn’t win. A team where Jose Lima was once a staff ace. A team where members of the pitching staff miss time because of nervous breakdowns.

And the Astros are interviewing someone from that organization for a job?

I know that the team is cursed. But still, come on, to quote John McEnroe: “YOU! CAN’T! BE! SERIOUS!”

Also interviewed was Ed Wade, the former GM of the Philadelphia Phillies. Wade built a team in Philadelphia that could compete, but couldn’t win. He traded for Bobby Abreu and nurtured stars Pat Burrell, Jimmy Rollins, and Ryan Howard. He also once worked in the Astros PR Department. So that should put him high up on Drayton’s list. But Wade also has a history of pulling Tim Purpura-type crappy trades.

And the Astros interviewed another winner of a candidate, Jim Beattie, a former big league pitcher who was a GM with Montreal and Baltimore. I’ll give this to Beattie, he’s used to working with nutjob owners, so Drayton should be nothing special. But it’s also been shown that he’s a bit of a failure when working for nutjob owners. However, with the Astros fast approaching Baltimore oriole levels of futility, he should fit right in.

It was also reported that the Astros will be interviewing former GM Bob Watson for the job. As for Watson, remember, he’s the one who thought trading Steve Finley and Ken Caminiti for Derek Bell and a bunch of stiffs was a good plan. He also traded Luis Gonzalez for Rick Wilkins. And current assistant GMs Ricky Bennett and David Gottfried will also be interviewed. I don’t know much about Gottfried, but I’m told that Bennett’s the guy who’s been in charge of the farm system, and the farm system hasn’t really been producing much the past several years.

What’s even funnier, and convinces me more that Reed was over by the Astros offices, was in listening to Tal Smith talk about how the Astros are offering one of the premier jobs in the country and how they’re being flooded with candidates.

The Astros. The same organization that ESPN, Sports Illustrated, (and read the SI.com article and notice the slams at the Chron. It’s nice to know I’m not the only one who wonders what really goes on at Houston’s leading information source) and other various national media organizations are claiming is radioactive, that no one wants to work for because of the idiot owner. And if the best and the brightest are clamoring for this job, then the Astros sure aren’t interviewing them.

As for the team, well, the season is another game closer to the end. And thank God for that. Last night’s final loss was by a final of 14-2. And the game wasn’t as close as the score indicated. The Brewers hit 5 homers, including 3 3-run home runs. I was watching the game, and I knew Matt Albers was starting, but I just had to check time after time to make sure Jose Lima wasn’t starting. The Astros were able to score 2 runs in the ninth inning after reliever Ray King walked a batter and Luke Scott homered.

And the fact that the announcers got pissed at Ryan Braun for enjoying his second inning blast was laughable. First, he’s a rookie. And he hit a shot. So let him have some fun. Second, have these guys ever watched Barry Bonds? Or Sammy Sosa? And I was disturbed to hear Neil Hohlfeld, one of the few remaining good and intelligent writers at the Chron advocating that the Astros bean Braun when the Brewers come to MMP in a couple of weeks.

The Astros are off today – and thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster for that – while they travel to New York for a weekend series with the Mets. The team’s 62-78, and there are only 22 games left.

It’s almost over, people. It’s almost over. -- John Royal


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