To the soccer moms who come to her shows expecting bits about dating and PMS, comedian Lisa Lampanelli says in a loud, northeast accent: Shut up ya dirty twat, lick it. Lampanelli might dress like a housewife, but her crude, often offensive sets have nothing wholesome about them. Often compared to Don Rickles, she likes to chide her audience about everything from their looks (You look like a retarded Harry Potter), to their sexuality (Youve been going out two weeks? Thats four years in gay), to their ethnicity (insert every racial stereotype imaginable). The heavy-set, middle-aged comedian appears regularly on Jay Leno and the Howard Stern Show, and her comedy album Dirty Girl won a Grammy nomination.
If youre initially put off by her insensitivity, dont worry, shes got a soft side: As a white bitch, Ive always felt we owe you black men the oral sex to say Im sorry for slavery. 8 p.m. Verizon Wireless Theater, 520 Texas. For tickets and information, call 713-230-1600 or visit
Fri., March 14, 8 p.m., 2008
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