An Older Man Got My Teenage Daughter Pregnant. Help!
Photo by Jeff Fitlow
Dear Willie D:
While my daughter was asleep, as a concerned father, I decided to check out what was keeping her glued to her laptop for hours. I didn’t have to do a lot of digging. As soon as I opened her imessage, I saw the name of a guy I didn’t know and started reading.
The first several messages were regular date stuff and flirting. Then I read a series of messages that began with him asking her what she wanted to do about the baby. My heart almost jumped out of my chest. My daughter is only 17 years old, and the guy, I found out, is 22.
Turns out they only had sex two times, and she got pregnant. I didn’t even know she was having sex. She told me they are not in love. Where I live, 18 is the age of consent. Should I go to the cops?
You could go to the cops and ruin his life, but I wouldn’t advise it. If I were in your shoes, I would try to stay calm, have a heart-to-heart with my daughter and reassure her of my support. You don’t want to exacerbate an already fragile situation.
I would also meet with the dude, and let him know how I feel and what I expect of him. If nothing else, going forward he needs to know your daughter has backup.
MY SON'S BLOOD TYPE IS DIFFERENT FROM MINE AND HIS MOM'S
Dear Willie D:
I took my 14-year-old son to an urgent care facility because he was having some issues breathing. They ran every test imaginable and took several vials of his blood. Making small talk, I asked the phlebotomist what my son’s blood type is, and she said B+.
Being fairly sure that my wife and I are both 0+, I asked her if she was sure, at which point she gave me a look as though she [had] said something she wasn’t supposed to say. To confirm, I checked the labels for myself, and indeed he is B+.
I searched the Internet, and found three articles from reputable sites saying it’s not possible for two people with type 0+ to produce a child with type B+ blood. My question to you is, how do I confront my “faithful” wife with this newfound dreadful information?
Before going in on your wife, double-check your own blood type first. If you’re confirmed to be type O+, check with your wife to ascertain that she indeed has the same blood type as you. If she does, sit her down and tell her about your discovery.
Whatever the case, if you can’t get over your wife’s deception, please don’t take it out on the kid. After 14 years of fathering a child, regardless of blood type, I think it would take much more than the lack of a biological connection to prevent me from continuing to do so.
HOW DO I DEAL WITH MY BIGOTED FRIEND?
Dear Willie D:
I’m a white female, and I have a biracial nephew of white and Mexican heritage, so clearly, I have a problem when my white friend tells jokes about Mexicans. She only does it when she’s drunk, so it’s hard to tell if she really means it or is trying to be funny.
I don’t have any friends in Houston except for her, so I wouldn’t want to lose her as a friend. How do I get her to stop saying offensive things about Mexicans?
A drunk mind speaks a sober heart. Meaning that usually whenever we’re drunk, we lose our inhibitions and allow ourselves to verbalize our true thoughts and feelings.
Your friend is a functioning bigot. You might be able to get her to stop saying offensive things about Mexicans “around you,” but she’ll still be thinking them. I don’t know how you could be around a person like that, let alone call her a friend. Silence is consent.
MORE IMMIGRATION IS BAD FOR AMERICA
Dear Willie D:
So, the immigrants had a big walkout to protest Donald Trump’s efforts to build a wall and close America’s borders to illegal immigrants, and to demonstrate how important they are to America’s economy. They thought they were hurting America, but what they did was expose how much we don’t need them. Some of them got fired.
The jobs they abandoned can easily be filled by the millions of born and bred Americans in our inner cities. I say let them continue to protest, and replace them all. What’s your take on the so-called “Day Without Immigrants”?
I’m all for born Americans in the inner city having first dibs at any jobs that might become available as a result of undocumented immigrant no-shows in the workforce, but the way things work around here, they will probably be replaced by immigrants.
Ask Willie D anything at willied.com/ask-willie-d, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.
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