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Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video
Photo by Marc Brubaker

Okay, okay, I know what you're thinking. A new Limp Bizkit video? Is this 1999? No, my friends, this is 2013: the year of the nostalgia act.

As irrelevant as Limp Bizkit may seem to those of us who grew up when they were a thing, there's a whole generation of kids growing up now who view them as some kind of genre progenitors; the kind of influential early band that paved the way for all your favorite deathcore and rapcore bands today.

How Limp Bizkit, of all fucking bands, ended up being the modern equivalent of classic rock is anyone's guess, but it was enough to attract Cash Money Records to sign them, so they must be doing something right. That being said, they still suck just as much as they did more than a decade ago, and their new video for their single "Ready to Go" is definitive proof. Here's a play-by-play of all the video's greatest hits.

1. "Go fuck yourself!"

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

The song immediately opens with the incredible lyric, "go fuck yourself!" Just so you know what you're in for.

2. The Light-Up Bass

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

3. The Ultimate Fan Pic

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

"I don't wanna see this on your MySpace page. Please, no gang signs. Nah, throw it up. I'm kiddin'."

4. What the hell happened to this guy's grill, and who is he?

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

5. Oh, it's Nicolas Cage in Zandalee.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

6. Ladies and gentlemen, Fred Durst literally taking a shit.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

Or, in other words, making this song.

7. So good, we had to see it twice.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

8. A move clearly stolen from Prince.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

9. Going Gaga

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

"I'm so poker face, ladies going gaga!"

10. This is about as sexy as the movie Teeth.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

  11. Wait for it...

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

12. Yes...

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

13. YES!

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

14. Wait, who's that?

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

15. YES! It's Lil Wayne!

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

"What the fuck is up? UH! Fuck the world, bust a nut! I'm on this and that and such and such! It's ashes to ashes, dust to dust, come on!"

16. Is this guy in Lil Wayne's crew?

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

If so, he's my new favorite.

17. Oh, is this the new Kings of Leon video?

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

18. No, it's a black metal video.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

19. And Fred Durst is an MMA fighter now.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video

20. Sorry Freddie, no play for Mr. Gray.

Breaking Down Limp Bizkit's Awesomely Bad New Video


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