Dear Willie D:
I’m a 27-year-old man who practices the Catholic faith. I got into some trouble with my foster parents awhile back, and they forbade me from coming to their house. I don’t know who my biological parents are, but I prayed and prayed that someday they would rescue me from each foster home I was in (a total of five).
I was married to a woman for eight months and 19 days. I gave her everything she wanted material-wise, and I loved her like I’ve loved no one before, but she still cheated. Before she left me for another man, I prayed that God would make her see that I was the right man for her, but again my prayers went unanswered.
If God really exists, shouldn’t he answer at least one of my prayers, being that I’m a faithful servant?
For whatever reason, your parents gave you up, and your girl cheated and ran off with another dude. Sometimes God removes people from our lives so they can no longer hurt us. Other than that, I don’t know why your prayers are going unanswered. All I can tell you is, the earth is a beautiful place; it must have had a designer.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE BAN ON SAGGING PANTS?
Dear Willie D:
I’m from Timmonsville, South Carolina, where we recently passed an ordinance to ban saggy pants. I saw on your Facebook post where you said you thought it would open the door for cops to racially profile. I don’t think it would. If you don’t want to get arrested or fined, pull your pants up.
What’s so hard about that?
I hate being subjected to seeing dudes in public with their drawers exposed and pants below their asses too, but sagging pants are the least of our problems. If lawmakers were as passionate about enforcing the laws that are already on the books as they are about enacting new laws, and Americans cared about the people wearing the sagging pants the way they do the sagging pants, the United States would be a better place.
These kids today are living in the moment. They don’t care what you think about their saggy pants when you are silent about the school-to-prison pipeline and them getting gunned down by racist cops.
Make no mistake, cops will use the ban to profile young black and brown males. I can see the new hashtag now: Pants up, don’t shoot!
MY GIRLFRIEND WANTS TO PAY ALL THE BILLS
Dear Willie D:
I recently lost my job, and I don’t have any money saved to get me through my rough patch. My girlfriend, who lives with me, has a good job, and has volunteered to pay all the bills until I can get back on my feet.
While I appreciate her doing that, I feel less of a man not being able to help out. I have never relied on a woman financially. How do I cope with not being a provider and contributor to my own household when that’s all I’ve ever known?
Provider & Contributor:
I hear you, but you should really count your blessings. Seems to me you have a rider in your corner. Most of the time when I get letters from guys complaining about money problems with their girl, it’s because she’s running through their pockets. You have to decide if the relationship is worth having. If it is, then you push through until you get your paper up. If not, leave.
If you choose the latter, just remember, you could end up having one of those “What The Hell Was I Thinking?” moments.
WHAT'S THE RIGHT WAY TO ASK FOR THE DAY OFF?
Dear Willie D:
I have an opportunity to perform at an important upcoming music seminar that will be filmed by a local television station. I’m a singer, and performing at the event would help me raise my profile in the city. The problem is, it takes place during my work hours and my boss won’t let me attend.
The job I have is not ideal, but I don’t have any other way to earn money to support myself at this time, so I need to stay employed. I’m thinking about going anyway, but I’m nervous as hell because I don’t have any money saved to float me until I can become gainfully employed again.
I’m hoping as an artist you can advise me on how to talk my boss into letting me go, or instruct me on other steps to take.
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Since it’s only a local show, I would take my behind to work, unless the seminar is in one of the major music cities bustling with record labels, or someone of importance who is capable of helping me get a deal or concert dates will be there.
Try asking your boss for permission again. Tell her that you will work late, or come in on your day off to make up for lost time. I would tell you to call in sick, but if your boss is particularly evil, she might have the seminar schedule programmed into her television. I can see her now sitting in front of the TV with her phone in hand staring at your number, just waiting to call to tell you, “You’re fired!”
Ask Willie D anything at willied.com/ask-willie-d, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.