I Think My Sister Is After My Man. Help!
Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!
Photo by Mario Jaramillo
CAN'T TRUST MY SISTER AROUND MY MAN
Dear Willie D:
I made the mistake of giving my sister intimate details about my boyfriend's sexual prowess in bed; since then she has been a little too close to him. She is always popping up at the apartment that he and I share. One day I came home to find her ass sitting on the sofa just a little too close to him. I gave both of them a good looking over and asked them what's going on.
I asked my sister why she didn't tell me she was stopping by, and she gave me some lame excuse about she didn't know she was going to come until the last minute. I don't know if it's just her or both of them who's up to something. I trust my boyfriend more than I do my sister. She has burned me before. They both swear nothing is going on. How can I be certain?
I could tell you to look for a change in affectionate behavior from your boyfriend, go through his cell phone and credit-card receipts, but that's too much work. If you want to quickly and efficiently ascertain that your boyfriend and sister are having an affair, install a webcam at home; hook up a GPS to his car; install spyware on his computer; or call the TV show Cheaters.
Nothing says you're busted like getting caught in the act with your pants down on national television.
MY GRANDMOTHER DIED AND I'M HAPPY
Dear Willie D:
I don't want to sound like Judas, but when my grandmother died I was happy. She was a very cruel woman. I never liked going to her house because she always made me and my brother clean her garage and mow her lawn for free when we were younger. She was mean to my mother also. Although they argued all the time my mother has been very depressed since she died.
I feel sorry for my mother that she is in pain, but I hated my grandmother and I'm glad she's dead. I want to ask my mother why is she so sad when her mother was so abusive to her, but I don't want to be disrespectful. Is it wrong to be happy because another human being has died?
I don't see a problem with being privately happy that a mean little old lady has died if it puts an end to her wicked ways. Regardless of how detestable a person was in life, he or she will leave behind someone who loved them. You don't have to have compassion for the deceased, but sympathy for the loss of human life is good and noble.
Your mother is hurting. For you to put aside self-interest for the benefit of another is impressive. I commend you.
More Ask Willie D on the next page.
Dear Willie D:
I can't thank you enough for the wedding budget advice you gave in March. Each time I cut an expense, your profound comments that "...the marriage is a lot more important than the wedding" echoed in my head. I had the most awesome wedding with all the trimmings. I couldn't squeeze the $3,000 limit, but because we cut our guest list down and I went with a less expensive dress as you suggested, we were still able to save a ton of money.
We also had the wedding on a Sunday as opposed to Saturday, which would've been more expensive. My total budget was $6,484, which was less than one-third of the original budget. I am so thankful that I wrote in to you. We are going to use the savings for a down payment on a new home. Of course you're invited to the housewarming.
Thanks for the kind words. May your marriage be blessed with incredible love and prosperity.
MY BOYFRIEND'S FRIEND CAME ON TO ME
Dear Willie D:
I was hanging out with my boyfriend and his best friend at a campsite, and when my boyfriend left to use the bathroom his friend grabbed me and quickly kissed me. I turned my head, but he forced his lips against mine real hard until I broke away. I have wanted to tell my boyfriend what happened, but I'm afraid that it will break up their friendship.
His friend has also sent flowers to my house before. How do I handle this situation?
You have created quite a dilemma for yourself. By refusing to share details of your boyfriend's best friend's inappropriate behavior when it first began, it's going to cause your boyfriend to question your loyalty. If you tell him now, he's going to be angry at the fact that you didn't speak up sooner. If you continue to conceal his friend's transgressions, you will encourage more of the same behavior from the friend.
Revealing to your boyfriend that his boy is stabbing him in the back by trying to sex his girlfriend is a difficult thing to do, but out of respect for your boyfriend you have to tell him what's going on. He will be upset, but he will eventually forgive you because you told him the truth. Don't worry about breaking up the friendship. It was never real in the first place.
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