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Ask Willie D

My Disabled Wife Won't Put Out. Help!

Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!

I WANT TO GET RID OF AN ANNOYING FRIEND

Dear Willie D:

I made the colossal mistake of befriending a girl that I met on Facebook. She was a friend of a friend so we just started following each other and liking one another's updates. After knowing her for less than a week she asked if I wanted to meet up at a popular bar for happy hour. Even though I thought it was too soon to be hanging out with someone I didn't really know, considering we both were females and in the same circle, I threw caution to the wind and met up with her anyway.

She arrived at the bar before I did and had already ordered appetizers, which was fine by me because I was hungry. As I took my seat at the bar the waiter asked me what I wanted to drink and she suggested, or shall I say ordered the same thing she was drinking for me. Now I'm thinking to myself, "control freak."

I sat there for two hours and forty-five minutes [waiting for traffic to clear up] listening to her talk about everything from her deaf cat to her brother's vasectomy. Once I heard her talking her own sister's business I had decided not to divulge anything to her about my personal life that she wasn't already privy to through Facebook.

It's been two weeks since we met up and I swear she text messages me everyday sending me invites to parties and asking if I want to hook up again. I've learned my lesson about online friends. How do I get rid of this girl without looking like a bad person?

New Friend:

The next time she contacts you, you could be direct with her and say, hey I think you're a cool person, but I don't believe we're compatible as friends. If you have to take it a step further block her on your phone, and on Facebook. If you have a tough time with confronting people, sense you have no real history with her it may be easier for you to simply ignore her.

There's really no polite way to get rid of a friend. However, you could let her get rid of herself by saying this: "Hey, I'm headed home to eat one of my friends for dinner - wanna come?"

MY DISABLED WIFE WON'T PUT OUT

Dear Willie D:

I am a 30-year-old man in my sexual prime and I have been road-blocked by my wife because of her handicap. She has been in rehab now for over a year, and manages to do things around the house. She even drives herself to therapy and runs errands. But when it comes to a little physical affection for me, she is never in the mood.

When I tell her how I feel she becomes angry and defensive; telling me I'm selfish and that I should be more considerate of what she is going through. She has told me that she will divorce me if I cheat on her. I feel like I have been more than patient. I have a strong desire to have an affair. I'm just torn between my sexual urges and the wedding vow I made to my wife to be faithful. What's a man to do, Willie?

Sexual Prime:

Road-blocked from the cookies at 30, huh? Let us pray...okay, moving on. Actually I agree with your wife. You are selfish and you should be more considerate of her condition. When it comes to women, you can't compare the physicality of household chores and errands with the emotionality of sexual intercourse. When I was 30, I probably would have tried to have my cake and eat it too by stepping out.

Today, if something in my relationship bothered me enough to cause me to consider the affection of another woman, I would leave before cheating. While a woman's body is something to be marveled at, I'm more impressed with her spirit. That said, your wife would be remiss to think that your sexual urges has vanished just because hers has. She don't have to go all-out to break you off a little something, but sweet lips go a long ways in bitter times.

More Ask Willie D queries on the next page.

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Willie D is a member of the legendary hip hop band, the Geto Boys, the host and executive producer of the Willie D Live podcast, and an advice columnist for the Houston Press since 2013.
Contact: Willie D