My Ex Is Forcing Me to Have Sex With Him. Help!
Photo by Jeff Fitlow
Dear Willie D:
I need your advice. An ex has tracked me down after I left him and moved. He's cliqued up, and he keeps communicating with me through so many people. Like, it's fucking crazy. He's an independent "business" man and cliqued up, so I know better than to call anyone.
He keeps asking me for pussy, and I told him no at first. Then I got tired of the bullshit and I was just like, 'If I fuck you, will you leave me alone?' He wouldn't accept. How can I get out of this mess?
Go to the police and file a restraining order. Then buy yourself a gun, go home and wait.
I BEFRIENDED MY FRIEND'S EX-BOYFRIEND'S NEW GIRL. NOW SHE'S MAD AT ME.
Dear Willie D:
I facilitated an excursion on an island while out on a cruise with my boyfriend, who is friends with my best friend’s ex-boyfriend. My best friend’s ex brought his new girlfriend on the cruise. It wasn’t like it was just the four of us; it was 32 people in our party.
During the excursion, the ladies split up with the guys, and I found myself walking and talking with my best friend’s ex’s new girlfriend. I didn’t plan on being around the girl much for the six-day cruise. I personally knew everybody in our party but her, so I didn’t think twice when my boyfriend said she would be with his friend.
We exchanged numbers, but I never called her because I did feel a little uncomfortable about befriending her, considering all the facts. Somehow my best friend came across a group picture we took on the cruise with me waist-hugging her ex’s new girlfriend, and she freaked out. She called telling me that I betrayed her friendship and hung up in my face.
When I tried to call her back, she wouldn’t answer. That was three months ago. We’re both in our thirties and this all seems juvenile to me. It’s not like I’m hanging out with the girl or talking on the phone with her every day. Should I try to repair our eight-year friendship, or end this chapter in the book?
You ever tried to put smoke back into a cigarette? That’s what it’s like when you try to re-establish broken trust. I would never befriend my friend’s ex’s new man. To do so would only create problems and cause my friend to be suspicious of my loyalty.
Step away from your friend for a while and allow her to fume. Let her call that other friend or close relative and tell him or her how dirty you did her. If you were a good friend all those years, she’ll forgive you because she’ll realize good friends truly are hard to find. Just don’t do that again.
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT DONALD TRUMP THREATENING HILLARY CLINTON'S LIFE?
Dear Willie D:
What do you think about Donald Trump’s comments in which he suggested that "Second Amendment people" should kill Hillary Clinton?
I don’t know if you can technically classify his comments as putting a hit out on Hillary. The comments were ambiguous enough for one to argue whether he was threatening her life or calling for increased political action. But considering the way Trump is wired, I would lean toward the idea that he probably was threatening Hillary’s life, which further proves he has no business running for President of the United States.
MY KIDS' MOTHER WANTS TO COME TO THEIR FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL
Dear Willie D:
My kids’ mother has never been involved in their lives. After she birthed each one of them, two girls [ages] eight and nine, she ran off to live her life. Now, all of a sudden, out of nowhere I get a call from her saying she wants to visit their school on the first day back.
This despite the fact that the last image they have of her is from three years ago when she visited them at her mother’s house, high out of her mind. She was so lit and incoherent, they couldn’t understand anything she was saying. Yes, they need to have a relationship with their mother, but it shouldn’t be on her terms whenever she feels like it.
She needs to respect my girls’ space and allow them time to process her back into their lives at a slowed pace. Wouldn’t you agree?
Lit and Incoherent:
I totally agree. You can’t let an absentee parent re-enter your kids’ life and shake up their routine whenever she gets a wild hair. She has to first show some consistency in other areas of her life, such as stable employment or a serious romantic relationship with someone else.
You call the shots and make the rules. She gave up her rights when she gave up her kids.
Ask Willie D anything at willied.com/ask-willie-d, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.