My Girl Took Part In An Orgy. Help!

My Girl Took Part In An Orgy. Help!

MY SISTER USES MY THINGS WITHOUT PERMISSION

Dear Willie D:

I’m 16 and my sister is 19. She is always wearing my clothes, my shoes, my makeup, my jewelry; everything. I’m sick of looking for my stuff and finding out later that she has it on. My mom refuses to get between us unless we’re about to fist fight. She always says that sisters should share, but when I wore her T-shirt one time without asking she snapped.

She thinks because she’s older than me that she can do whatever she wants to me. She bought a pair of jeans that she’s been saving for a special occasion and I’m going to wear them to a big party just to piss her off. What do you think about me doing that to get revenge?

Sisterly Revenge:

I absolutely love it. But if you can’t beat her fighting you may want to reconsider.

I’M WAY TOO CLINGY

Dear Willie D:

I’m the type of girl who constantly tells my boyfriend I love him. I also call him several times a day at work and get mad whenever he spends time with his friends instead of me. When he calls me clingy, or tells me to give him space, I get really upset and cry, then I shut down. I don’t want him touching me, and I refuse to have sex with him sometimes for weeks.

I don’t like being this way, but I can’t help it, even when I’m aware of what I’m doing. How do I stop being so clingy?

Clingy Chick:

It appears as though you have too much time on your hands. If you don’t have a hobby, get one. If you have one, get another one. That way you won’t spend every waking day worrying about what’s going on with your man. It’s okay to want to be around your man, but when he’s not around give him space, and use the time for him to miss you a little.

Oftentimes people are clingy due to fear of abandonment, and what happens is, that clinginess becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because the other person ultimately leaves them. Intimacy is nice, but too much closeness is categorically annoying.

MY WOMAN PARTICIPATED IN AN ORGY

Dear Willie D:

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I thought I knew everything about my wife; that is, until I discovered she had an orgy back in her college days. I used to think that my wife was top-chef filet mignon. Now since I found out about her past I feel as though she’s just a regular old hamburger.

I still love her, and after 25 years of marriage I wouldn’t think of leaving her. But I feel like I married a slut. This happened before she met me but still, should I feel ashamed of this?

Endless Love:

I can see having reservations if you had known about the orgy from the onset of the relationship, but that was ages ago. People do all kinds of foolish and reckless things in their youth. You’re not who you were 25 years ago, and your wife isn’t who she was 25 years ago. The past is the past; let it go.

...And another thing: I like hamburgers.

I HAVE A PROBLEM RESPECTING AUTHORITY

Dear Willie D:

I’m what you might call the black sheep of my family. I have been to jail for selling meth. I have used meth, I get drunk and fight, and I don’t have a lot of friends. Back when I was in high school I got into a lot of fights, so my mother took me to see a head doctor and he said I had OCD. I then started taking the Zoloft he prescribe to manage the disorder.

I don’t think the drug really helped me, though. I was always conscious of my behavior, and would use my diagnosis as an excuse to act out. I got away with a lot of stuff most people would have gotten locked up for. I spit on a cop once and got arrested for assaulting a police officer. But they dropped the charges because of my condition.

I think the reason for my anger is because I resent people who think they have power over me telling me what to do. Parents, teachers, policemen, and even my ex-wife. That’s why we are not together anymore. In just about every sphere I rebel against authority. My aggressive nature gets me in trouble a lot. What can I do to stop being hostile towards authority?

Black Sheep:

In life, all of us at times have to deal with people who hold some degree of power over us. That power could last for several years such as with parents and teachers, or for a few minutes in cases where you might be pulled over by a policeman for a traffic violation.

The philosophical writer and speaker Jiddu Krishnamurti said, “It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”
Sometimes we are compelled to disregard authority when we feel as though they want us to comply with the status quo or if we believe they’re incompetent or untrustworthy.

I’m a rebel by nature. If I feel violated I will react, but I would be remiss to not recognize that without the proper respect for authority, and fear of the consequences for our actions, the chaotic world we live in would be even more chaotic. Adopting that logic would serve as a major deterrent towards your anti-authoritarian hostilities.

Ask Willie D anything at askwillied.com, and come back next Thursday for more of his best answers.


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