Most rap boasts revolve around three things: cash, chicks and anus - as it turns out, rappers love to brag about their ass a lot. But after years of bragging about the same three things, redundancy blurs the line between braggart and ridiculous. Even the best of the best MCs have succumbed to lyrical faux pas at some point. Here are 10 lyrical gaffes your favorite rappers wish they could take back.
"Don't try to treat me like I ain't famous/ My apologies, are you into astrology, cause I'm, I'm tryin to make it to Uranus"
Kanye got sidetracked by his desire to reach Uranus and bungled his rhyme like an anus.
"If you don't bring back my muthafuckin money or my muthafuckin dope/ You can forget about Christmas nigga, cause you ain't gon even see New Year's."
Master P must have bumped his head against one of those No Limit tanks on his way to the studio:
"Thirty-two grams raw, chop it in half, get sixteen, double it times three/ We got forty-eight, which mean a whole lot of cream/ Divide the profit by four, subtract it by eight, we back to sixteen."
Foxy can't keep her numbers straight when breaking down the street math on this Nas song.
"I like the way ya ass move to the beat/ You a freak, that's something you can be"
Wait, is she already a freak or is that something she can be?
"Niggas get shot daily, everyday"
And Sticky won't let up till he kills them dead:
"I like them black, white, Puerto Rican, or Haitian/ Like Japanese, Chinese or even Asian."
Just...wow. Chingy is a genius:
"First family will gradually lift that ass up like gravity"
Isaac Newton heard this one, spun violently in his grave and died again.
"Young, black, and famous, with money hanging out the anus"
First, this guy is literally a rich asshole. Second, he holds the record for weirdest boast ever. On the bright side, these words might come in handy next time we see a kid eating a dollar bill: "Don't put that bill in your mouth! You don't know where it's been! I saw that same bill hanging out Diddy's anus two hours ago!"
"F-L-Y like a B-R-I-D in the sky"
K-Solo can R-A-P but he can't S-P-E-L-L.
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"But you ain't got the skills to eat a nigga's ass like me"
All right, look, this doesn't mean what you think it means. But it sure as hell sounds like Canibus is bragging about his proficiency at analingus. We're amazed that anyone would fuse those words together and not notice the ambiguous connotation. Regardless, 'Bis is still a beast, and "Second Round K.O." is still a classic diss in our book.