We like fireworks and explosions, and with July 4th right around the corner, we are sure to get our fill. Things burning or blowing up are pretty cool, except of course if it's your house, car or business. In that case, it's an awful, horrible atrocity and God is a bastard for letting it happen to you. What's up his ass?
For those about to burn or blow something up for the insurance money, we salute you. That takes balls the size of China, and you should show us how you did it. We are behind on our car payments and want to buy a motorcycle.
Things have been getting blown up in music videos since the first time a director picked up a camera and made someone lip-sync their new hit single for the lens. Explosions convey power and drama, and also show everyone that you have at least a little love at the record label for helping you splurge on the costs of shooting.
Sometimes directors have to blow things up more than once to get the shot right. Did you know that the director shot the explosion scene in the video for Limp Bizkit's "Boiler" six times? Some say it was to attempt to maim Fred Durst, and some are deliciously right.
We collected our ten favorite music videos of stuff done getting blowed up in video history. We lead off with the best explosion ever, the Who's 1967 appearance on The Smothers Brothers Show, wherein drummer Keith Moon secretly put too much gunpowder in the fuse and nearly blew him and Pete Townshend to hell. Townshend still has hearing damage from the incident, and Moon just laughed, shagged a bird and died 11 years later.
1. The Who, "My Generation": "Yeah, we are going to blow up Moon's drum kit after we finish the song. Nah, I got it covered. I put the exact amount of explosives in the kit. Nah, I hid the rest of it of from him. He won't find it. Promise."
2. The Plasmatics, "The Damned": The best part is the opening tag to not try blowing up a school bus at home. To lead singer Wendy O. Williams' credit, she seems to be the only woman who Lemmy was scared to sleep with. That's rock.
3. Hell City Kings, "Never Let Go": Local death-punkers the Hell City Kings just released this video for their HPMA-nominated single "Never Let Go." It's an insane Tim & Eric-inspired vision of fire, chicks and party.
4. Fat Boy Slim, "Gangster Tripping": Fridges, toilets, home entertainment systems, bookcases and closets weren't immune from explosions in this video from Fatboy Slim's watershed 1998 album You've Come a Long Way, Baby. Shot in slow motion, it's literally porno for pyros.
5. Metallica, "I Disappear": For their song from Mission: Impossible II, Metallica went widescreen with a video that echoed Hitchcock and Kafka. At the end, Lars Ulrich barely makes it out of exploding apartment.
6. Limp Bizkit, "Boiler": All Fred wanted was a maggot-infested hamburger, but if you want something done right you do it yourself. By our account, out of the dozens of videos that Bizkit made, only five didn't have a fire or explosion of some sort.
7. Nena, "99 Luftballoons": We were going to write a capsule for this video in English and then get Google to translate into German, but we are on deadline.
8. Korn, "Got The Life": Korn also had beaucoup amounts of fiery blasts in their videos. All that label money behind the rap-metal movement must be to blame. Now we are lucky if we get a tattooed stripper in a cage. For shame.
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9. Billy Idol, "Dancing With Myself": So apparently '80s Billy Idol was a really bad conductor of electricity. But there was nothing bad about his bad-boy looks (licks lips, puts on aviators and drives off in a Camaro).
10. Miranda Lambert, "Kerosene": We would let Miranda Lambert burn whatever she wanted. Grandpa's old farmhouse? It was condemned anyway. A collection of our baby photos? We weren't that cute, so you are doing us a solid.