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We Need More Rapper 8-Bit Video Games

2 Chainz and Juicy J have owned 2012, whether you like it or not. Both of them could have ran for President of the Ratchet United States of America and won in a landslide on the 2 Trippy ticket.

Their greatest gift to mankind this year? Time-wasting awesomeness in the form of 8-bit video games.

You see, Señor Dos Necklaces gets some sponsor money from Adidas. He's one of the faces of their "Live In Color" campaign and by default gets to show up performing in commercials. So he, Adidas and Champs Sports teamed together to craft the Live In Color game where 2 Chainz in SNES form runs around Atlanta jumping over trash cans, zombies and the paps to grab his favorite accessories and shoes. It's like first-gen Mario in the Trap. (Play Here.)

Juicy J's game, on the other hand, is far more to the point of his ubiquitous "Bandz a Make Her Dance" track. You get dropped in a strip club, where you have to make it rain on a stripper to keep her on the pole before she hits the ground. The joyous and most meta part of it all? The Juice Man congratulates you for spending so much money. Capitalism, meet Strip Club American Dream. (Play Here.)

And so, like the complete procrastinator I am, this calls for a bit of wondering about the Houston rap scene and its particular niches. And trust, these games are all kid-friendly so we're not stepping on any toes here.

DOUGHBEEZY Game: "Be Doughbeezy!" Plot: Wake up as 8-bit Doughbeezy and collect enough powerups (microphones, weed symbols, styrofoam cups) to get through a day where everything has to be done before he goes back to sleep, only to get chased by fans, thirsty women and then some. Also comes in Halloween zombie form.

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Brandon Caldwell has been writing about music and news for the Houston Press since 2011. His work has also appeared in Complex, Noisey, the Village Voice & more.
Contact: Brandon Caldwell