MORE Is Still a Thing?

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The above image is a screenshot of an e-mail that appeared in my inbox recently. It's from If you have never heard of it, well, it's not surprising. Just as certain inventions like the car killed off horse-drawn carriages, Classmates has been rendered almost entirely useless by Facebook...yet the good people of Classmates seem to hang on and, get this, they actually charge for it.

You heard me. This enticing e-mail with the promise of seeing pictures of some ex-significant other -- in hopes they got wrinkled and disfigured after leaving you for that jackass jock at the prom -- or some dude you thought was dreamy in 10th grade, second period algebra -- he's now a night watchman at warehouse park who enjoys long walks on the beach and scratching himself -- will cost you a membership fee to find out the answers.

Of course, this is exactly what Mark Zuckerberg invented with Facebook (or didn't you see The Social Network?) only better and more free. Sure, they use your information to sell you stuff and your photos to sell stuff to your friends, but it's not like you are being charged like money.

To me, it's somewhat of a miracle that Classmates is still around. There was a study published not long ago that found the number one reason men visit Facebook is to see pictures of women they know and the number two reason is to look at photos of women they don't know. Classmates is charging for that shit and I have no idea why anyone would pay for this, but they do.

No doubt the numbers are dwindling, but any number seems too high given the circumstances. I personally have no desire to pay to see photos of old high school "friends" who I am not connected to on Facebook, but someone is and Classmates is capitalizing. If they can pull that off, maybe they can bring back faxing and typewriters and answering machines. That would be something,

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