Game Time: LSU Football Coach Les Miles Breaks Down the Oil Spill (w/ video)
I think most people are in agreement that LeBron James' decision to broadcast his decision of where he would be playing basketball next season -- for the record, he chose "South Beach" -- on the creatively titled, made-for-sheep-like-us ESPN infomercial LeBron: The Decision was a disastrous public relations decision for LeBron.
Notice I didn't say it was a disastrous programming decision. ESPN pulled a 7.3 which was roughly twenty times what they normally pull in that time slot this time of year. I came away entertained, insomuch as it was fun watching LeBron sit there like he was being held hostage in a propaganda film, but he left the city of Cleveland a smoldering mess afterward.
So LeBron broadcasting his decision? A little offensive. On the other hand, I would sign up right now for a show that would broadcast LSU football coach Les Miles deciding virtually anything. Which quarterback to play, which toilet paper to buy, whether to put his car in neutral at a car wash....ANYTHING. In fact, I would pay double my monthly cable bill for a Les Miles Channel that followed him around all day long.
What made me think of this? How about Les Miles' opinion on the oil spill in the Gulf Coast (brace yourself).....
University of Houston Cougars Football vs. Tulsa Golden Hurricane Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 15, 11:00am
Rice University Owls Football vs. UTSA Roadrunners Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 15, 6:00pm
Rice University Owls Football vs. Prairie View A&M University Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 22, 2:30pm
University of Houston Cougars Football vs. UCF Knights Football
TicketsSat., Oct. 29, 11:00am
As stupid as that answer sounds, the transcript is....I mean, oh my God...
"Well it uh...the impact is more of a, uh...eh, ya know, anything, anything along the, the uh, the the the shore, and those issues are they're very, they're very serious issues and they're....uh, the impact is on the, the uh....you know, what is...the natural resource of our country. Uh, but uh, ya know, I don't know that it's, I don't know exactly, uh, to what extents, ya know it's, it's being...uh, handled well and managed and or mismanaged, I have no idea...the only thing I know is it's very sincere, and it's, it's uh, it effects more than Louisiana, it effects...the ocean..."
(It literally took me fifteen minutes to transcribe that statement -- seven minutes to stop laughing, seven minutes to actually transcribe, and one minute to question God's sense of humor that Les Miles probably made over $4 million dollars before taxes last year.)
There's not much left to say. I just want to send all you kids out there into the weekend with a glimmer of hope. The moral of this story --- if you ever thought that it was really, really hard to land a college head coaching job, much less win a national championship, just remember...
Somewhere, Miss Teen South Carolina feels vindicated.
Listen to Sean Pendergast on 1560 The Game from 3-7 p.m. weekdays on the "Sean & John Show" and follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you'll never miss Houston Press' biggest stories.