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Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

Christmas season is a time of warmth and love, especially if it concerns two leathermen engaging in sweaty doggie-style buttsex.

At least that's the thinking among people who enjoy X-rated Christmas-tree ornaments, and we can only assume those people don't have a lot of little nephews and nieces over for egg nog.

Here are ten of the more, ummm, striking ornament possibilities out there. The first one is safe for work; after that you're on your own.

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

10. Santa the Pantyhose Boy Mr. Claus indulges his feminine side here. Maybe women should make sure he doesn't rifle through their panty drawers looking for something sexy.

Like we said, after this it gets NSFW in parts, so proceed at your own risk.

 

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

9. Frosty the Blow Man Somehow we keep thinking of Ralphie's friend in Christmas Story getting his tongue stuck to the icy flagpole.

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

8. The Gift Box It looks like she already got her present, in the form of some surgical implants.

7. Mrs. Gingerbread's Surprise Wrong hole!! WRONG HOLE, DAMMIT!!!

 

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

6. Santa's Knees Ain't What They Used To Be "I'm paying you, so you can do all the work!" Also, Santa wants it to be clear he's not paying for sex, he's paying so she'll leave without any bullshit after the sex. Got it?

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

5. Subtle At least there's no honeydripping going on here. Be thankful for the graceful touches.

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

4. Frosty the Domme Man It's apparently not two leathermen, and there's no guarantee it's buttsex, but we're sure there's one of those out there on the Web. Two questions: One: The guy topping is wearing a ball gag? And two: Does snowman BDSM ever involve dripping candles?

 

Hey Kids! See the 10 Most Tasteless X-Rated Christmas Ornaments! (NSFW)

3. Boobies!! Slap a nip on an ornament, and you're done. As with Barbie dolls, the Peanuts comic strip and Crayola "flesh"-colored crayons, at some point the titty-ornament industry got progressive and added a nod to the black community.

2. Three Flaccid Dicks Just in case your tree is getting a little monotonous with all the hard-ons.

1. Thank God There Were Two Carrots Consult a doctor for any carrots lasting more than four hours.


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