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Houston and Denver: Where Dreams of Being a Male Cheerleader Go to Die (w/ VIDEO!)

Cheer on, pioneer.
Cheer on, pioneer.

Check out our slideshow of Texans Cheer tryouts.

It's been a longstanding joke that since the time Gary Kubiak took over the reins of the Houston Texans, every facet of the organization here has some tie to the Denver Broncos. If the Texans pick a player up off the waiver wire, oftentimes it's someone who played recently for the Broncos. If a coach comes here, typically they've been part of a Broncos staff and oftentimes already worked with Kubiak in Denver.

Hell, there's still a big part of me that thinks tight end Joel Dreessen's leaving here to go play for Denver isn't so much a permanent arrangement as it is Dreessen's being some sort of chip to return the favor to the Broncos, like he's more of an exchange student than a football player.

But I digress...

The reason for this post is to share the latest little piece of NFL history that the Texans and Broncos share -- their cheerleading squads are (to the best of my knowledge) the only two this season to have a male try out for the team.

This past weekend, both teams staged tryouts for the purposes of assembling their 2012 cheerleading squads.

We start in Houston....

America, say hello to Dixon Hernandez.

In a field of approximately 1,000 Houstonians, Hernandez was the lone male trying out and, boy oh boy, did he leave it all on the floor, dancing for the judges like no one was watching! Observe in the video below:

When I heard that Hernandez was trying out for the squad, sight unseen, my immediate assumption was, "Hey, maybe he's trying to be like one of those male college cheerleaders, with the yolked-up biceps. Or maybe he's trying to meet women. Where better to find 999 hot, potentially available babes?"

After seeing the interview, well, um, I think it's probably neither of those things. In fact, Hernandez said as much after the tryout, saying that he was basically trying to pave the way for other men who may want to don a skirt, knee socks, and platform shoes the Texan colors someday:

"So I was like, 'why not try out, and just go for it and have some fun?' I'm here to have fun, and for the experience and, you know, just to see what it's all about," Hernandez said. "Who wouldn't want to be a Texans Cheerleader?"

Indeed, Dixon. Who wouldn't? On behalf of all men who may someday lose a bet and have to try out want to chase that dream, thank you, kind sir, for blazing the trail.

Meanwhile, out in Denver....

 

(This is the part where, if this story were told on Swamp People , they'd show an overhead map of the United States and it would shift quickly from Houston out to Denver.)

....Dixon Hernandez's much more appropriately named counterpart Sacha Heppell was dancing his way into the hearts of judges at the Broncos cheerleader tryouts. With an overall base of candidates about a fifth the size of that in Houston (which makes sense since Denver itself is about a fifth the size of Houston), mathematically at least Heppell's chances were better than those of Hernandez.

Alas, the Bronco cheerleading squad is apparently just not quite ready for the proverbial wiener roast. They decided to stay all-female, and told Heppell that he dances like a deleted scene in a Jim Carrey sketch needed some work.

Both Hernandez and Heppell have indicated they will give this a try again next year. The blogger in me sure hopes so.

Check out our slideshow of the Texans' cheerleader tryouts.

Listen to Sean Pendergast on 1560 The Game from 6 a.m. to 11 a.m. weekdays, and watch the simulcast on Comcast 129 from 6 a.m. to 7:30 a.m. Also, follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/SeanCablinasian.


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