James Robert Monday's Manic Monday: East Texan Busted For Hauling Off Air-Water Machine from Store Parking Lot
In the latest of our series of "Only in East Texas" crimes, an AARP-aged man by the name of Monday was busted on the day of the same name for -- get this -- stealing a convenience store's coin-operated air and water dispenser.
Not the quarters in it, mind you. The whole freaking thing.
According to police, surveillance video from way back in October of 2010 shows 66-year-old James Robert Monday driving up to Lufkin's modestly-named Okay Food Store and tying a chain to the dispenser and driving off with the machine dragging behind.
You know how we know you're a redneck, Mr. Monday? You allegedly committed felony theft of an expensive piece of machinery that might have contained $20 in quarters.
Gridiron Glory: The Best of Pro Football HOF -- 10AM-3PM
TicketsTue., Feb. 28, 10:00am
Rice Owls Men's Baseball vs. Pepperdine Waves Men's Baseball
TicketsFri., Mar. 3, 6:30pm
Rice Owls Women's Basketball Single Game Tickets
TicketsSat., Mar. 4, 2:00pm
U Of H Men's Basketball Chart
TicketsSun., Mar. 5, 3:00pm
We heartily endorse the thoughts of a commenter on KTRE's site: "This guy rocks. He is the face of East Turkeyville. Well done sir. Well done indeed."
Lufkin Crimestoppers broadcast the bizarre heist on KTRE, and tipsters identified Monday to police. Monday was picked up Monday while he was at the Angelina County Courthouse on unspecified business. He faces a theft charge and must answer to four Class C warrants, and has met his $1,000 bond.
Last year, Monday was busted for possession of a controlled substance, and for DWI and reckless driving at around the same time of his alleged dispenser theft. His record also includes convictions for cruelty to animals and injury to a child.
Get the ICYMI: Today's Top Stories Newsletter Our daily newsletter delivers quick clicks to keep you in the know
Catch up on the day's news and stay informed with our daily digest of the most popular news, music, food and arts stories in Houston, delivered to your inbox Monday through Friday.